WWE No Way Out 2004
San Fransisco, CA - February 2004
CHAMPIONSHIP RUNDOWN: Coming into this show, Brock Lesnar is the WWE Champion, The Big Show holds the United States Championship, and Rey Mysterio was the Cruiserweight Champion. SmackDown's WWE Tag Team Championships were held by Rikishi and Scotty 2 Hotty.
COMMENTATORS: Michael Cole and Tazz
After a video hyping tonight's main event, Rikishi and Scotty 2 Hotty defend the World Tag Team Championships against The Bashams and their dominatrix manager, Shaniqua, in a handicap match. Its hard to watch the Bashams and not think of Jim Cornette ripping apart the WWE Creative Team for taking two his "can't miss" prospects from OVW and giving them one of the worst gimmicks of any era. This match comes off more dated than 5 Chris Bukowskis (look him up). Rikishi and Hotty were always decent hands in the ring, but by 2004, they were at least 3 full years past their sell by date. The Bashams are fine stooging it up and Shaniqua getting hers popped the crowd, but this is the kind of match you feel kind of embarrassed to watch. At least it only runs 8 minutes. (1/5)
Next up - another match where we see some man-on-woman violence: Jamie Noble vs. Nidia with the stipulation that Noble has to wear a blindfold. These two had been paired up for several months based on Noble becoming a trailer park millionaire. At first, he treated Nidia wonderfully, but then turned on her after she went blind (when she got struck by Tajiri's green mist - which hadn't blinded anyone else ever but her in the dozens of times he'd used it). Anyway...Nidia is about as good an in-ring worker as she was a manager, which was not very. Nidia won the first ever Tough Enough in 2001, was sent to OVW for seasoning, and then kept on the roster (I believe) because the company didn't want to just blatantly admit that the contest was not just a reality program that wouldn't lead anywhere. More of a at comedy match than anything, at least it ends the right way with Noble tapping Nidia out. Another match that I'd recommend watching in private because if anyone, even a loved one, sees you watching this match, you'll feel weird. (0.5/5)
The APA take on The World's Greatest Tag Team next in a match that is, interestingly, built mostly around Bradshaw (not yet JBL, but definitely being positioned more prominently than Ron Simmons by this point). As wikipedia supports, Simmons knew he was retiring so I'm not surprised they built the end of the APA's run all around Bradshaw (and his legitimately devastating Clothesline from Hell). While Bradshaw very nearly captures the win, the booking here is really smart as he ends up knocking Haas out cold but forgetting its Benjamin who is the legal man and eating the pin fall himself. This isn't a great match, but its well-worked and accomplishes what it needs to. Plus, the WGTT really were a great team in their day, their double-team maneuvers and mat-based offense so much fresher than whatever Rikishi and Scotty 2 Hotty and the Bashams did in the opener. (2.5/5)
Before the next bout, we get a pretty great segment involving Goldberg, Paul Heyman, and Brock Lesnar. On RAW, Steve Austin had given Goldberg a front row ticket to No Way Out, so he shows up (surrounded by security like any other fan), but this sends Heyman into a tizzy. Heyman tells Goldberg to stay in his seat and Goldberg does so...until Brock Lesnar shows up and calls him a bitch. One would have imagined that this segment would've had tremendous heat, but for whatever reason, it doesn't (though Lesnar calling Goldberg a bitch does get a huge reaction). Now, I'm not saying the crowd is indifferent - they're definitely not - but this feud just felt considerably hotter in 2017. I'm guessing part of the issue was that Lesnar, who debuted a heel, turned face, and then was turned back heel all within 24 months, had been somewhat overexposed and, because he lacked the charisma of Austin and The Rock or the "everyday man" appeal of Foley or the otherworldliness of Taker, his ascension to the heights they had reached was always an unrealistic expectation in the "grey era" between the Attitude Years and whatever we want to call the "Brand Above All" years (where Cena, a reunited DX, Mysterio, Taker and others all shared the weight of carrying the company's main event scene). It also probably didn't help that Goldberg's run on RAW had been hit-and-miss and really seemed on a downturn by this point after he failed to retain his championship at Armageddon and then failed to even make it to the final handful of competitors in the Rumble. Then, despite a hot opening, we get some not-so-intense, not-so-smooth physicality between the two that somehow looks overtly choreographed and under-rehearsed at the same time. Goldberg hits a Jackhammer and is then handcuffed and escorted out of the building as Heyman screams for them to take this trespasser outta here (and Cole and Tazz, playing Blue Brand loyalist, besmirch his name as well). This isn't a perfect segment, but Heyman is stupendous in it and it certainly accomplishes its goal of hyping their Mania match without outright advertising that they'd be facing each other (like a contract signing might). (+1)
Hardcore Holly comes out and chases Lesnar out of the ring and in a sheer coincidence of good timing, its also time for Holly's match against Rhyno. This one starts out pretty strong, with both guys showing a ton of fire and really laying their shit in. As the match goes past the 5-minute mark, though, you can really tell that this audience just wasn't hooked and did not want to see a long drawn-out match between these two that didn't at least feature some "fireworks" (tables, chairs, etc.). I appreciate Holly's work more now that I've read his book and can see that he really was a reliable mechanic, but the lack of "It" factor was ultimately what kept him in the midcard - it also didn't help that, in a match like this, its not necessarily clear who the audience should be rooting for or against. Are they both faces? Both "tweeners"? If one is a heel, one should be antagonizing the crowd a little bit. Rhyno eventually hits a massive gore that gets a good response, but Holly rolls out of the ring before Rhyno can get the pin. Holly rolls back in at 9 and manages to use his last bit of energy to connect with the Alabama Slam. Weird finish that tried to sell the Gore and the Alabama Slam, but Rhyno got the short end of the stick because Holly ends up surviving his finish and then winning 30 seconds later. Dumb. Why not have Rhyno miss the Gore and then have Holly get the win? Too predictable? Regardless, this wasn't terrible, but it wasn't great. (2/5)
A video package plays to review Chavo Guerrero's feud with Rey Mysterio Jr., which began over Chavo attacking Eddie on an episode of SmackDown and also included Mysterio's celebrity boxer buddy Jorge Paez bickering with Chavo Classic.
Before the match can happen, though, the lights go out and we hear the familiar sound of the Deadman! A screen reads "In 28 Days...the Dead Will Rise Again," foreshadowing the return of the Undertaker at WrestleMania. They got much better at these sort of videos in the future so I'm not giving it a point as this was just kinda there.
Chavo Guerrero (and Chavo Classic) make their way down the aisle to try to wrest the Cruiserweight Championship against Rey Mysterio, who is joined by the aforementioned Jorge Paez. Good back-and-forth action to start, these two having no issue with keeping their feet on the gas pedal for awhile. I've never been a big Chavo fan, but he's undeniably sound in execution. As anyone might've expected, the minute Chavo Classic gets involved, Jorge Paez decks him (though the camera doesn't really capture it as well as it should've). A brief "Jorge!" chant starts as he's gets to the back by Jimmy Korderas. Chavo heads out of the ring to try to help his father, but ends up getting hit by a huge springboard plancha from Mysterio! Back in the ring they go and Mysterio lands another massive springboard move - this time a leg drop. Chavo manages to survive, though, taking a hell of a beating but fighting on. Chavo attempts to hit his tornado DDT, but Mysterio fights out and tries for his own hurricanrana from the top. However, Chavo resists it and lands a not-so-great gutbuster from the top rope. Chavo keeps the pressure on, slowing things down and applying an abdominal stretch and then, a minute later, a painful-looking half-crab. Mysterio manages to nearly turn things around, but gets cut-off by a spinning gutbuster in a great sequence. Chavo continues to try to keep things ground-based, but Mysterio fights back with a bulldog counter. Chavo attempts a third gutbuster, but Mysterio escapes. Chavo gets sent into the ring post but Mysterio doesn't have the energy to capitalize. Mysterio hits a forward russian leg sweep for 2 and then a DDT-like drop on the apron for another near fall. Mysterio's luck runs out, though, as he misses a crossbody and Chavo hits him with a sit-out gourdbuster. Mysterio hits a moonsault, but again only gets 2 as Chavo puts his foot on the rope. Chavo continues to target Mysterio's chest with a crazy hangman-into-a frontfirst slam thing. Rey hits his 619 but Chavo counters it into a half-crab, which would've felt even bigger if Chavo had been spending more time working on Rey's back instead of his front. Rey grabs the ropes the ref breaks the hold. Chavo argues with Korderas as Rey goes to the top rope, only to be pushed off by a revived Chavo Classic! Guerrero rolls him up and grabs the tights for good measure to steal the Cruiserweight Title! This match wasn't as inventive as Rey's more legendary bouts with Eddie, but this was still above average and I could see others rating it even higher than I did. (3/5)
Backstage, Chavo gets interviewed by my favorite personality of this era: Frost-tipped Josh Matthews! Just him being on this show earns this show a bonus point. (+1)
Next up is an old fashioned Number One Contender's Match - the US Champion Big Show taking on John Cena taking on Kurt Angle. Cena is still doing the rapper gimmick at this point, but is now a "tweener" leaning towards babyface and is fairly over but definitely not "Main Event a WrestleMania" over so I doubt anyone thought he'd get the win here (then again, I think he'd feuded a bit with Lesnar earlier in the year so maybe some people thought it was a possibility). If Cena had a 1% chance of winning this match, Big Show had to have had a 0% as despite his kayfabe credibility (and the hype of the commentators about his string of successes over the past few months), I think the fact that he got eliminated last in the Rumble a month earlier kinda solidified the idea that he wasn't in line for a World Title push. So, the question of this match is whether they're going to successfully swerve or even semi-swerve the audience into caring about the foregone conclusion of Kurt Angle winning the match. I'm not sure the finish is ever in question, but the journey there is fun enough and the story is logical and well-executed. Cena is not as jacked as he would later become, but he still manages to lift Show up for the FU not once but twice. He hits a bunch of his signature moves, but the pacing between them is quicker and less self conscious, which helps the match come off more organic than what you might get if they tried to run this same match today or even 5 years ago. Kurt Angle eventually taps Cena out for the win. Nothing really special, but not a bad match at all and could even be an interesting watch for Cena fans that are unfamiliar with his rise to the top of the card around this time. (2.5/5)
Main event time - Eddie Guerrero challenging Brock Lesnar for the WWE Championship. Unlike most other matches on this show, this match wasn't really heated up with a major blood feud or anything (Guerrero won the title shot by winning a 15-man battle royal on SmackDown). Lesnar/Goldberg was pencilled in for Mania (the angle between them earlier in the show made that even clearer if the Rumble confrontations weren't enough) and while Lesnar had made things personal by bringing up Eddie's not-so-clean past, it wasn't like this match was built up for months and months. The fact that this match started off somewhat cold makes it even more impressive how quickly both guys manage to whip the crowd into a frenzy, assume their respective roles, and then just go from segment to segment building tension the whole way through. Tazz and Cole do a fantastic job on commentary too, playing up Guerrero's underdog status without any sense of foreshadowing. It really comes across like they are as positive that Lesnar is leaving with the title as everyone else in the arena. Guerrero spends much of the match bumping and selling, but he never "dies" and the hope spots he does hit all showcase his craftiness. Lesnar, meanwhile, gets to not only dish out some high impact power moves, but also his uncanny wrestling ability. Seeing Lesnar work here compared to what he does now in 2018 is really something. He may hit harder now than he did back then, but the guy used to be as spry and athletic as he was strong. At one point, the crowd chants for "Goldberg," but its a credit to Guerrero's efforts and the patience he and Lesnar show to go out and wrestle a relatively "no frills" straight-up contest (no table spots, no chairs) that by the third act of the match, the audience is engrossed in the battle between these two going on right in front of them rather than worrying about the arguably "bigger" storyline implications. Eventually, a sloppy F-5 does lead to a ref bump and the arrival of Goldberg, but the fact that Lesnar kicks out of the post-Spear cover by Guerrero helps lessen the idea that Guerrero only won this match due to outside interference. Did Goldberg's actions help set the stage for Eddie's win? Sure...but it still feels like Eddie earns his victory, which is why when people remember this match and its feel-good conclusion, there's never the sense that the title change was cheap. Like Bret Hart vs. Mr. Perfect from SummerSlam 91', which was, for years, my favorite match, this is one that you'll often see top people's lists of favorite matches largely because of the personal connection Eddie made with fans even before his death. It is an imperfect match - even if the Goldberg run-in doesn't taint things, there are other questionable spots, including Eddie hitting his trademark trio of suplexes so late in the match against a guy who outweighs him by a good 80-100 pounds. Despite some flaws and maybe an inflated reputation, it still holds up as one of the more rewarding watches from this era. (4/5)
With a Kwang Score of 2.5-out-of-5, No Way Out 2004 is far from an all-time classic, but it does offer enough good wrestling and cool segments to make it watchable. The main event is rightly beloved match, while the Mysterio/Chavo match is above-average. The Lesnar/Goldberg segment is fun and, hey, there's Josh Matthews with the frosted tips hanging out too. Everything else ranges from fairly terrible (the opener) to surprisingly decent (the APA match). It would be wrong to recommend this show as a whole, but I've sat through far worse.
FINAL RATING - High Risk Maneuver
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