I will readily admit to having never seen a TNA PPV before this one (which I got on DVD from the local library - shoutout to the CPL!) and I wasn't a regular viewer at this time - or really any time - so this was all new to me.
The show kicked off with AJ Styles vs. Rhyno in a Last Man Standing match. Styles was the heel in this match (based on the fans various anti-AJ signs). Earl Hebner was the referee, which reminded me that he was let go from the WWE a couple years before this. The crowd is very excited about this match, popping huge for Rhyno's early offense. AJ catches a break, though, and tries to tire Rhyno out with a choke. Rhyno counters, though, dropping AJ face-first in one of the 6 corners moments later. AJ didn't stay down long, though, connecting on a wild front-flip splash to the outside. Back in the ring, Rhino hits a spinebuster that somehow busts AJ's nose and gets a 3 count - which is one of those things that really takes away from a Last Man Standing match as the wrestlers inexplicably stay down for 3 seconds from a move that would never otherwise end a match. Fortunately, West and Tenay actually do a nice job explaining why a wrestler would accept a 3-count in a Last Man Standing match (as it would essentially give them more time to recover and regroup), but it still just seems anti-climactic to see guys get pinned multiple times in a match before the actual finish while simultaneously being really dumb that they'd ever not just take a pin to get that recovery time as the match wears on. That's to say nothing of the way a 10 count kills the momentum of almost any match. Anyway, when the stipulation isn't getting in the way of logic and storytelling, AJ and Rhino deliver lots of good moves and AJ's bumping and selling is characteristically excellent - especially when he takes an insane Gore that flips him inside out. Phenomenal bump there. Sadly, the finish is absolute hogshit as Styles accepts the loss and runs out of the Impact Zone to avoid getting piledriven through a table. Ugh. That was just bad, bad booking that did no favors to anyone. (2/5)
After running down the rest of the card, we cut back to the entrance ramp where Rhino piledrives AJ Styles on the floor and then grabs a table. He sets the table up near the entrance and attempts to Gore Styles through it, but AJ dodges it and Rhyno goes through the thing himself. Why not just use that finish to end the actual match? To protect Rhyno? Why?
The X-Division Champion Christopher Daniels defends his gold against the veteran Jerry Lynn and Chris Sabin in a triple threat match next. Jerry Lynn cuts a promo about being 43 and still being able to hang with the best. 43? In the WWE in 2021, that wouldn't even cause a head turn. Hell, at that age, you're actually more likely to get a WrestleMania main event these days. Anyway...the crowd is behind Jerry at the start and not very supportive of Sabin playing the cheapshot artist. This one was a bit underwhelming to me, lasting under 12 minutes and ending with a less-than-definitive stolen victory for Sabin. While there were some good spots - especially Jerry Lynn's devastating reverse and cradle piledrivers - but in the end, this wasn't the spotlight match that I thought it would be and really just seemed kinda average. (2.5/5)
We get a Paparazzi Productions video next. I'm sure this ran on TV beforehand, but because I absolutely loved these segments, I'm going to go ahead and give it a plus +1 point here. I know this was not everyone's cup of tea and even I'd admit that it got less and less funny as Nash and Shelley started involving more and more guys, but whatever, its still funnier than anything I've seen the WWE produce in 20 years. (+1)
So here we go with the Finals of the Paparazzi Championship Series - Alex Shelley vs. Austin Starr (Aries). Nash joins in on commentary, which is usually a treat - aside from the risk that he's going to basically bury the talent. The first judge is "Samoalian Joe," a masked man. The second is Big Fat Oily Guy, a big fat oily guy. Last, we get the legendary Bob Backlund. Shelley is the babyface as the storyline coming in is that Nash had started favoring Austin Starr. Nash and Tenay make some jokes at the WWE's expense with Nash making some self-deprecating jokes regarding his match against Backlund from 94'. This match has a 10-minute time limit, which one would think would mean that Aries - err, Starr - and Shelley would cut a brisk pace, but they actually do some mat wrestling to start and space apart the big high flying moves, not in any real rush to tell their story. Shelley eventually lands a huge suicide dive in front of the judges and then adds some points to Backlund's scoring sheet. The match is full of tiny moments like this, but either the audience doesn't care or they just unnoticed entirely. This same match in Ring of Honor would've probably been a huge and even more physical affair, but here, the context is far less serious and it does negatively affect what, after a somewhat underwhelming start, becomes a very good, very physically intense contest. With 9 minutes gone, Tenay finally mentions the 10-minute time limit. With 15 seconds left, Aries applies a not-so-hot looking camel clutch that Shelley looks like he could easily slip out of. Not a great ending there. Jeremy Borash goes to the judges as the crowd chant for Shelley. JB announces the first two votes and they are, predictably, split. Backlund grabs the microphone before his vote is announced and instead of declaring a winner, Backlund gives a series of random, confusing scores based on his own criteria. His scores somehow add up to being a draw, which brings Nash into the ring, who then rules that because the judges could not make a decision, it goes to a 5-minute overtime. Shelley immediately goes for a series of pins and gets one within 10 seconds with a nifty counter to an Aries brainbuster attempt. The post-match angle with Starr abandoning the PCS and then brawling with Senshi (after doing a super accurate impression of him) is good fun too, keeping the heat on Aries despite the loss. Before its all over, Aries gets the Crossfaced Chickenwing too. The in-ring action was good, the comedy hit-and-miss, but I liked the post-match stuff. Nothing worth going the extra mile to seek out, but it kept my attention the whole time and entertained me. (3/5)
After a video package recapping the split of America's Most Wanted, its time for "Cowboy" James Storm (with Gail Kim at his side) to take on former friend Petey Williams. Storm is known mostly as a tag team specialist, but at this point he seemed like a viable singles star. He has some impressive offense and gets decent heat from the Impact Zone crowd, though Williams is also an easy guy to bully. Storm controls most of the match, but needs the ropes to get the victory in under 10 minutes. Not a bad match, but more like a TV match than a PPV match and, in hindsight, if TNA was serious about getting Storm over as a real singles star, he should've gotten a more definitive victory here. After the match, Storm handcuffs Williams to the corner and then chokes Gail Kim, who fights back and looks to smash a beer bottle over Storm's head only for Jacqueline to show up and take her out! Storm and Jacqueline perform AMW's finishing move on Kim and leave together. The post-match helped this stay in the average range. (2.5/5)
A video package plays of the Voodoo Kin Mafia - BG James and Kip James (aka Billy Gunn) - recapping all of their anti-WWE hijinks and their million dollar challenge against DegenerationX, who were 1000% never going to show up for this "match." BG James cuts a promo about how the WWE is too scared to face them, which is absurd, and the fans barely pop for any of his insults. This is just a boring segment that draws attention to how second-rate TNA is. Before the VKM leave the ring, Christy Hemme shows up with tears in her eyes, complaining that everyone has ignored Chyna. She then goes on to talk about Lita and how all the women in wrestling are not disposable and shouldn't have to "run from this business." This promo could've actually been good if it was well-produced, but instead, someone told her to push the histrionics up to 11 instead of just talking out the beats like a normal person would. This was a trainwreck of a segment.
Backstage, Team 3-D (the Dudley Boys) cut a short promo hyping their match against the Latin-America Exchange (LAX) for the NWA World Tag Team Championships. The Dudleys had joined TNA in 2005 but had somehow not won the NWA World Tag Team Titles in the year they'd spent in the company, which is surprising considering TNA's penchant for immediately thrusting former WWE talent into the title picture. Hernandez and D-Von start things off, but its not long before Bubba and Homicide come in. Bubba would get in much better shape for his run as Bully Ray a few years after this, but just because he's at his heftiest here it doesn't mean his work is any less bruising. Despite the match featuring some pretty good action, like in most Team 3-D matches, the fans start asking for tables. Team 3-D hit their finish on Homicide minutes later, but he's not the legal man. Brother Runt (Spike Dudley) shows up, swigging whiskey and dressed up as Santa Clause. He hits a splash on Homicide, which leads to Team 3-D getting disqualified in yet another weak finish. I had somewhat high expectations for this match as both teams are known for intense, physical, violent matches and TNA, at the time, wasn't afraid to have bloody, violent brawls. But this wasn't that and the finish was especially lame. (2/5)
The Ironman Match between Samoa Joe and Kurt Angle is next. If I'm not mistaken, the first Angle/Joe match set a record buyrate for TNA, which tells you how over Angle was and how much Joe was seen as the Next Big Thing. A clock ticks down in the corner of the screen for the duration of the match, which is a tad distracting. Angle takes some time off the clock early by regrouping on the outside every time it looks like Joe may get some momentum, setting the tone that this is not just a fight, this is an athletic contest where strategy matters. With 8 minutes in, Angle applies a headlock and cinches it in tight but Joe manages to get his foot on the ropes to break the hold. Angle attempts to hit a vertical suplex, but Joe counters it with one of his own and Joe is back on offense, eventually sending the Olympic Gold Medalist to the floor and connecting with a suicide dive through the middle ropes! Back in the ring, Joe hits an off-the-ropes powerslam for 2, but after sending Angle into the corner, gets hit with a release German. Joe goes for a Muscle Buster but Angle escapes only for Joe to apply the Rear Naked Choke! Angle taps in order to save himself from the exhaustion of having to fight the hold (which is noted on commentary). It proves to be wise strategy as Angle eventually applies a nasty reverse chinlock of his own as the clock ticks past the halfway point. Joe refuses to tap, though, so Angle attempts an Angle Slam - but Joe counters it and hits him with a big knee off the ropes! Joe tries to reapply the Rear Naked Choke, but Angle reverses it into an Ankle Lock and now its Joe's turn to tap out, evening the score to 1-1 and saving himself from too much ankle damage. Less than 3 minutes later, Angle reapplies the hold and goes up 2-1, Joe really selling the hurt in his ankle now. A "Lets Go Joe/Let's Go Angle" chant breaks out, the crowd split between arguably the two best workers in the US at the time. Joe rallies and hits Angle with some big strikes, including a running knee in the corner. Again he goes for the Muscle Buster and again Angle counters it and then connects with the Angle Slam for 2.8! With 8 minutes left, Angle attempts another Ankle Lock but Joe rolls through and sends him into the corner and then finally hits the Muscle Buster to tie things back up! Joe sends Angle to the ropes, but Angle comes back with an absolutely nasty chopblock to Angle's hip then reapplies the Ankle Lock in the center of the ring. With 6 minutes left, it is not a wise time to tap out. Joe kicks his way out, but Angle comes right back at him and ends up getting a pinfall off of a victory roll to go up 3-2 with just over 5 minutes left. Joe comes out swinging while Angle wisely goes to the outside, smart psychology there. Back in the ring they go and Angle looks like he might be able to grind this out, but Joe nails him with a big slam. Joe looks for another Muscle Buster but Angle slips out and under the ropes, pulling Joe's knee into the post with under 3 minutes left. With 2 minutes to go, Joe hits another Muscle Buster, but this time Angle gets his foot on the ropes! Joe tries to apply a Rear Naked Choke, but Angle works to try to get the Ankle Lock - only to get kicked off. Joe again tries to cinch in the Choke but Angle continues to roll him off and counter it every way he can. Great struggle here. Joe applies an Ankle Lock of his own, though, grapevining it with less than 20 seconds to go! Angle looks like he might tap but holds on for the remaining time. I don't like how he taps out with the clock at -1 second as it just seems unrealistic in such an otherwise realistic, smartly-worked match. This is one of the most watchable Ironman Matches I've seen as even the "restholds" are worked with intensity and struggle. Angle sometimes gets criticized for a "go-go-go" style, but this is well-paced and he does more than enough to put Joe over as a top level talent. I'm not sure I'd consider "must see," though, it comes very close and, if you are a Joe or Angle fan, worth seeking out. (3.5/5)
Main event time - Sting vs. Christian vs. Abyss for Abyss's NWA World Championship in a 3-Way Elimination Match. During the build-up for this match, Christian brought back his buddy Tyson Tomko (who is put into a shark cage at ringside by James Cornette before the match) and hinted that he knew Abyss's dark secret. Sting tried to befriend Abyss and have him cut ties with his manager, James Mitchell, aka The Sinister Minister, who was also aware of his horrible secret. I'm not sure what the secret was or if it ever got revealed. Sting was 48 years young coming into this match. Despite being a heel, Christian has maybe the most passionate supporters of anyone in the ring. Within the first 5 minutes, Abyss gets the visual pin on Christian but the ref is busy dealing with Tomko, a non-finish that I think came too early and made Christian look fairly weak (though I guess the point was further establish Abyss as a monster). Working against that theory, though, when the ref comes back in the ring, Abyss takes a Scorpion Death Drop (reverse DDT) and Abyss gets cleanly pinned. Its a legit shocking elimination just because it doesn't seem at all earned. After Abyss hits a chokeslam on Sting, the match continues and, again, its noticeable that Christian's "peeps" outnumber the "Lil' Stingers." Sting no-sells some Christian strikes, hits a guerilla press slam, and then a Stinger Splash and a superplex from the corner. James Mitchell shows back up and distracts Sting but he still manages to apply the Scorpion Death Lock. Mitchell unlocks Tomko's cage and then distracts the ref, allowing Tomko to break up the submission and attack Sting. Christian goes for the cover, but only gets 2. Tomko comes back in, Abyss shows up, Christian ends up with the championship belt in his hand but can't use and Sting hits the Unprettier but only gets 2. Now there's a ref bump. They've really thrown the kitchen sink into this match with James Mitchell ending up in the Scorpion Death Lock - only to get struck by a chain from Abyss! Is Abyss heel or face? Christian hits a frog splash on Sting and revives the referee and Christian gets the win and the title. Considering the quality of work that Christian would deliver in the WWE when he returned in 2008 and through his excellent feud with Randy Orton, this was a disappointment. (2/5)
With a Kwang Score of 2.64-out-of-5, this is not the type of show that is going to make me pluck down the dough to get the Impact Wrestling app and check out more shows from this year - or really any year. The main event was a bit of a mess, AJ Styles/Rhyno is poorly booked, and the X-Division Championship doesn't deliver either. The best match on the card is Joe/Angle (as anyone would've expected), but even that match falls short of being the classic it probably could've been with a better finish. The less said about the embarrassing Voodoo Kin Mafia segment the better too. I'm sure TNA/Impact die-hards would look back on this more fondly than I did, but I'd consider this a...
FINAL RATING - High Risk Maneuver
No comments:
Post a Comment