Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Kane is our opening contest. The fans voted for this one to be a No Holds Barred match, though the stipulation doesn't come into play until the final third (when Kane brings a chair into the ring to try to finish Rey off). These two probably worked 100 matches against each other over the years and this is one of them. This isn't a bad match, but it isn't particularly memorable and definitely follows a well-worn script whenever these two are in the ring together. Kane dominates the early going, Rey bumps and sells his ass off, Rey takes advantage of Kane bringing a chair into the ring, and then eventually Kane's own momentum costs him the match as he crashes into the steel steps in the corner. Solid enough and, because Rey is so good at bringing the live audience into his matches, this ends up being slightly above-average. (3/5)
Next up - Matt Hardy defending the ECW Championship against Evan Bourne (who was voted in above Finlay and Mark Henry). I'm not sure if the voting on this show was fully on the level, but I'll credit the WWE for at least making it somewhat believable that the results weren't a work. This earned 3 and a half stars from Meltzer, which is a tad high, but I am watching this 15+ years later when this sort of match - heavy on the action, lots of back-and-forth and counters - is more common than it was back then. Hardy clearly came into this match wanting to "make" Bourne and it doesn't quite work because the opening stretch is a bit slow and underwhelming and it may have been better to have Bourne come out of the gates with some of his explosive offense before Hardy cut him off. Hardy grinding down on Bourne as the veteran doesn't make for an interesting dynamic and Bourne doesn't get to put his foot to the gas enough to shine. By the end, the crowd is into this and behind Bourne - note that Hardy actually tries to pull the tights at one point in a moment of heelishness - but this was not the star-making performance they were going for. (2.5/5)
The fans had a choice to vote for the next match between three tag team options (including Punk & Kofi vs. Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase) and went with Cryme Tyme vs. The Miz and Morrison, which isn't super surprising. This is a looong 10 minutes, not because it's not good, but because they throw a ton of stuff into it, all sorts of tag team shtick and building to a hot tag and heel trickery. I'll give credit to all four men here as they do everything they possibly can to get and keep the audience's attention even if the actual work isn't always great in terms of technicality or execution. (2.5/5)
I should note, between every match, we get to see various divas in their Halloween costumes cutting promos related to their get-up and some of them are cringe. There are also some divas in here that I don't remember existing at all. Like, who is Lena Yada?
Backstage, Chris Jericho tries to enlist some help from The Great Khali but is turned down. He'd also tried to get Legacy to help him out earlier to no avail.
Santino Marella and Beth Phoenix make their way to the ring for the next match. Marella cuts a promo before the show, brings up the Honk-A-Meter, and gets a jab in at Shaquille O'Neal, who is sitting ringside. The fans got to pick Santino's opponent and it is noneother than...The Honky Tonk Man. Honky also cuts a promo, does some dancing, and then challenges Santino to show off his moves. Santino does some weak dancing and then slugs Honky in the face. They do a little bit of wrestling before Beth Phoenix trips up the challenger and gets Santino's disqualified. Santino yells at Beth Phoenix, but as they attempt to make their exit, Goldust shows up and then Piper as well (they were the other two options that fans could've voted for). The legends scare Santino back into the ring where Goldust hits his stalling, spinning suplex and then Piper and Honky get in their shots (including Honky landing his patented swinging neckbreaker). This didn't make a ton of sense and seemed really thrown together. A half-point for Santino's pre-match promo. (0.5/5)
Big Show vs. The Undertaker is next in a Last Man Standing match (the other match types that were options were I Quit and "Knock Out," which are basically also Last Man Standing matches). Back-and-forth brawling to start things off in and out of the ring leading to Taker grabbing a chair and bashing Show in the head with it. Back into the ring they go where Taker hits some splashes before getting put down by a clothesline. Big Show takes control and hits the Deadman with a bunch of body blows and headbutts - very tame stuff in a Last Man Standing match. Back out of the ring they go for more brawling and chair-based violence. Credit to Big Show and Taker, considering that neither guy is very quick and that the entire match is really about building to Big Show's Knockout Punch, they keep the crowd engaged and Taker's selling is on-point. I dug Taker countering Show's chokeslam with a DDT. When they make their way back out of the ring, we see Taker take a chokeslam through a table. I liked the final stretch too, though I didn't particularly care for the finish itself as Big Show is put to sleep with the Triangle Choke. I'm not usually one to rate a match on whether "the right guy won" and its hard to argue that, had Big Show won, he would've went on to have some all-time great run. The fact is, Big Show's career, especially in WWE, was often built around him being built up over a couple months and then falling to a babyface like Cena, Batista, or The Undertaker and he delivered in this match. Not necessarily a hidden gem, but better than you may remember it or think it would be. (3/5)
The Divas Costume Contest is next. Mickie James wins and then a "cat fight" ensues. Whatever.
Triple H defended the WWE Championship against Jeff Hardy in the next bout. The other options that fans were voting on included having Vladimir Koslov get the shot or for it to be a triple threat. I'm glad Vince was smart enough to see that, if the voting was at all meant to be portrayed as legitimate, Hardy would win in a landslide. I reviewed their No Mercy 2008 match four years ago and had to re-read it because I don't recall it being particularly great. Sure enough I wrote that it was above-average but not "must see" and I'd say the same thing about this match. I liked the way they traded mat wrestling technique early and I liked that Triple H showed his cunning and expertise throughout the match as the crafty Champion who is clever enough to not let the match get away from him. Jeff Hardy is very good here too. The problem is that what should've been a match where Hardy showed he was even closer to winning the title than he was at No Mercy (with Triple H maybe even needing to pull something cheap out of his heel bag of tricks) came across as just more of the same. Hardy not being able to successfully connect on all of his signature moves was a nice way to protect him, but it also prevented me from biting on any of the near falls towards the end. Plus, with Hardy, you're always going to have at least a couple of moves that look off (Hardy barely grazing Triple H with a splash out of the ring and then bouncing up despite hit the floor much harder himself). (3.5/5)
Main event time - The World Heavyweight Champion Chris Jericho defended against Batista with "Stone Cold" Steve Austin voted in as the special guest referee over Shawn Michaels and Randy Orton. This was a ton of fun and while I wouldn't rank it as an all-time classic, I've got no problem putting this in "should watch"/"hidden gem" territory. There's a slight hiccup when Jericho looks to be applying a Liontamer and Batista's shoulders are down for what certainly seems like a 3 count (Austin hesitates to make the count, giving Batista just enough time to turn his body), but that minor gaffe is made up for by the end of the match as both Batista and Jericho deliver some outstanding work. I loved Jericho's precision throughout the match and Batista's selling of knee damage. The finishing stretch is full of chaos and run-ins, but I liked the way this match tied up multiple on-going storylines and also introduced a new one with JBL showing up to take out Shawn Michaels after HBK essentially screwed Jericho out of a win. Not being 100% sure on the outcome of this match - the title was "hot potato'd" a few times that year if I recall correctly - added considerable suspense and I'd recommend not spoiling this one for yourself if you've never seen it or don't remember how things unfold. (4/5)
With an overall Kwang Rating of 2.71-out-of-5, Cyber Sunday 2008 isn't an all-time classic but really only featured one stinker in the Intercontinental Championship "match." Both World Championship matches are strong and the Big Show/Undertaker match is considerably stronger than it looked on paper. The opener was also above-average, though that could almost be expected considering it involved Rey Mysterio, arguably the most consistently good-to-great wrestler in history, and the two matches that followed weren't too shabby either.
FINAL RATING - Watch It...With Remote in Hand
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