WCW Starrcade 91'

WCW Starrcade 91'

Norfolk, Virginia - December 1991

CHAMPIONSHIP RUNDOWN: Coming into tonight's show, Lex Luger is the reigning WCW World Heavyweight Champion, Rick Rude is the US Champion, the WCW World Tag Team Champions are Steamboat and Dustin Rhodes, the WCW Light Heavyweight Champion is Jushin Thunder Liger, the TV Champion is Steve Austin, and the US Tag Team Champions are The Young Pistols.

COMMENTATORS: Tony Schiavone and Jim Ross

After watching so much 2000 WCW, going back to 91' is a huge breath of fresh air - even if it is maybe just as laughable and poorly booked at times.

This show is built around the "Lethal Lottery" concept - heels and faces tagging up together with the winning teams ending up in Battle Bowl, an over-the-top rope battle royal at the end of the show.

Michael "P.S" Hayes and Southern Boy Tracy Smothers go up against Hayes' Freebird partner Jimmy "Jam" Garvin and a very young Marcus Bagwell to kick things off. Smothers plays the heel because the Freebirds are over as faces (which is somewhat surprising considering how lame they were, but locale matters) and Bagwell is a good-looking vanilla face too. This dynamic is for the best too because Smothers is the best bumper, seller, and worker of the bunch by what I can see. When the Freebirds do square off, they actually wrestle each other a bit, milk the crowd for some appreciation, and make a tag. Its a smart piece of psychology that makes Hayes knocking Garvin senseless an even bigger deal moments later. Bagwell ends up hitting the Fisherman Suplex for the win. Not a terrible opener and the Freebirds seem motivated to have fun with the concept (which means they actually put in some effort to keep the crowd engaged beyond just doing the same tired shtick they'd been doing for the past few shows). (2.5/5)

Bischoff, Hyatt, and Magnum TA pull out the next couple names - "Stunning" Steve Austin teaming with "Ravishing" Rick Rude to take on Van Hammer and Big Josh. Aside from Hammer, this actually has the makings for a really great match because 3-out-of-4 are pretty superb workers. Hammer and Austin start things off and while Austin isn't as great as he would (swiftly) become, he's still just the right amount of over-the-top with his selling to make him stand out as a guy to watch. Hammer surprises by executing some actual wrestling holds, but the most established workers - Rude and Big Josh (Matt Borne) - are the reason to ever watch this. I love how Rude works this match, no-selling early because he absolutely should as the lone guy to sniff a main event. Borne, meanwhile, shows why he deserves to be praised as one of the best "character" wrestlers of his day. As dumb as his gimmick is, he betrays his wrestling experience and focuses on using his power and rugged offense to make him seem like a threat to Rude. Unfortunately, this match just goes too long for it to be considered good. There's a needless resthold stretch that just seems like buying time and it ruins this from being a hidden gem. Its unsurprising that the company would want these guys to go long considering the talent in the ring, but the last half drags this to unremarkable territory despite how enjoyable the first exchanges are. (2/5)

Next up - Larry "The Crusher" Zybysko and El Gigante vs. Richard Morton and Dustin Rhodes. Larry is going by "The Crusher," I'm guessing, because "Living Legend" made him seem old. As someone unfamiliar with his glory days and only familiar with his days on commentary - that I didn't like - I'm always somewhat surprised how good he is in the ring. Even here, a decade (?) past his prime, he has the speed, energy, and execution of a top worker. Dustin Rhodes, conversely, is very fluid considering his age. You can see why the moniker "The Natural" was well-earned and why he went on to have a tremendous career while Scott Putski and Greg Gagne didn't. El Gigante is El Gigante so you know his segments will involve other guys walking into his offense like dummies, but at least in tags it could be (somewhat) hidden and you have Zybysko working overtime as his second. Morton continues to flounder as a heel, a transition that in a perfect world would have lengthened his career and been a big deal but that is ultimately a forgotten series of months that nobody, rightfully, speaks of. Gigante eventually tires of Zybysko and pulls him from outside of the ring back into the fray by his neck to a big reaction. This allows Rhodes to hit a dropkick and score the pinfall in a crowd-pleasing finish. Not a good match, but not total crap because of the hard work of Larry Z. (1.5/5)

Jushin Thunder Liger teams up with Bill Kazmaier to take on Mike Graham and Diamond Dallas Page next. Kazmaier is so one-dimensional in this match that one might argue he's less effective in his role than Gigante is in his. Liger and Graham steal the show when they are in the ring together, which is no surprise considering the experience level of their partners. Unfortunately, while Liger dazzles, there's still too much downtime in this match and anytime he's out of the ring, the crowd is completely dead. This match and the one that came before it are more evidence than one would ever need to argue that the concept behind this show is one of the worst things WCW ever attempted (and that includes all the crazy crap they tried after the company went into a tailspin in 99'). Where you could have had solid entertainment in a Liger showcase match against Graham or a competitive bout between Zybysko and Dustin Rhodes or even a comedy match between The Living Legend and El Gigante, instead WCW presented two tag matches that were worse than the sum of their parts, matches literally designed to highlight tag partners' lack of chemistry. Why would anyone pay for this? Surprisingly, according to the numbers I found, over 150,000 people thought it was a good idea - which was more than what Halloween Havoc earned in October and that show actually featured a World Title match and the first ever (and only) Chamber of Horrors Match. I know which one I convinced my parents to purchase for me when 7, I'm just surprised I was in the relative minority. Points awarded for Liger and Graham's work, nothing else. (1.5/5)

Did I say that the Lethal Lottery concept was all about putting heels and faces together? Whoops. I guess they dropped that part of the theme because the next match pairs Arn Anderson and WCW World Champion Lex Luger against Terry Taylor (who had half-turned back into a face due to his frustration with the York Foundation) and "The Z-Man" Tom Zenk. This is a competitive match and, as the commentators note, Luger and Anderson mesh well together in attitude - though they don't really combine their efforts much or even dominate as much as they probably should've. Terry Taylor is the guy to watch here, working super hard in the fiery babyface role and holding his own against two of the top heels in the company. This was better worked than the previous couple of matches, but it still felt like nothing more than a decent TV match (at least by today's standards). Plus, I'm not sure how much Luger, the World Champion, gained by not being able to make quicker work of two guys that had been pretty firmly established as TV Title/midcard level stars. I know he's a heel and all, but having to rely on Harley Race in all of his major PPV matches seemed unnecessary in this context. (2/5)

Cactus Jack is paired with Buddy Lee Parker to take on Ricky Steamboat and Todd Champion (of the deservedly forgotten team WCW Special Forces), but before Parker can make it to the match, Abdullah The Butcher beats him down backstage and comes out in his place. Abdullah is prevented from getting involved in the match and then continues to beat down Parker on the outside of the ring as he tries to make his way down the aisle. As silly as this may sound, its actually an intriguing way to start the match and could've led to some real interesting outcomes. Unfortunately, this match doesn't seem to make sense or tell any story with any logic. Down 2-on-1, Jack should be getting his teeth knocked in and, while this might make him sympathetic, it could also be played to make him look a bit like Max Cady in Cape Fear, a nutcase whose pain threshold is so incredible it makes him even more terrifying. Instead, we see Foley work a really good match, but his character isn't enhanced and that's a shame considering the opportunity presented. Meanwhile, Tom Parker getting beaten down repeatedly actually leads to a portion of the audience cheering for him - which makes sense - but because he is soundly beaten by Ricky Steamboat, it doesn't seem like this was part of the story at all anyway. Speaking of Steamboat, its a good thing he went onto the Battle Bowl because, like Luger and Arn Anderson in the prior match, he seems like a star who should be above all this nonsense and mixing it up with other main event level guys. This match was a real lost opportunity to me. (1/5)

Sting teams with nemesis Abdullah the Butcher to take on Flyin' Brian and Bobby Eaton next. As one might expect, this match is a mess from the very start as Abdullah goes after Sting and Pillman makes the save (despite being on the opposing side). There are some good moments in what is mostly a wild brawl, though the camera misses maybe the best one as you can hear the crowd pop for Flyin' Brian lifting the Butcher with a bodyslam. I love Pillman's energy in this match, but I dislike how much he's rooting against his own team, cheering on Sting as he literally eliminates him from a chance to win the show's main event prize. The energy level, use of weapons, length, and finish - as well as the relative weakness of practically every other match since the opener - makes this arguably the show's best match. (3/5)

Rick Steiner and The Nightstalker team up to take on Big Van Vader and Curtis Hughes in the next contest. This is one of those matches that isn't great, but makes up for it by being interesting. For starters, the camera avoids any close-ups of The Nightstalker, which is bizarre, but maybe points to WCW actually having some sense and realizing that with his impressive size, the future Adam Bomb deserved better than being just a job guy. Or maybe they realized that a guy named The Nightstalker shouldn't be wearing peach tights? Regardless, he's a non-factor in this match as Rick Steiner chooses (for no apparent reason) to go it alone and try to beat two 350+ pounders. Scott Steiner had a reputation as gobbling up his opponents in the ring, to the point of unprofessionalism, but Rick Steiner proves it runs in the family here as he and Vader get off on the wrong foot early with a mistiming/miscommunication and work very snug from then on. Maybe Rick Steiner is upset about the finish? He performs several power moves on Vader, but only the first overhead belly-to-belly looks good as Vader doesn't seem too eager to get tossed around. The Nightstalker eventually tags himself in, which pisses off Steiner, and the match devolves with all four men in the ring going at it. The Nightstalker tries to set up Curtis Hughes for the patented Steiner Bulldog but ends up getting leveled by a stiff Vader clothesline. Vader then hits him with a splash right onto his upper body while the Stalker is sitting up and it is awkward and painful-looking as it sounds. I'm not sure if Vader is taking his aggression from the Steiner stiffness onto Bryan Clarke or what, but it just seems like nobody wanted to cooperate with anybody else and this was the end result. Not a match to seek out, but more than watchable for all the physicality. (2.5/5)

The second last Lethal Lottery bout of the match pits Scott Steiner and Firebreaker Chip against Johnny B. Badd and Arachnaman. This might be the only Arachnaman match I've ever seen and I'd be lying if I said I was impressed. Who in their right mind would've thought this character would work? I know Brad Armstrong is a solid worker too, but you'd have to be a Juventud/Mysterio-level high-flyer to do justice to a "Spiderman wrestler" gimmick. On the flip side, Firebreaker Chip is surprisingly sound in this match. I had no idea this brute could actually exchange holds but he does. Scott Steiner is the best worker of the bunch and is merciless against Johnny B. Badd. The action in this match is good, but the duration is bizarrely long. I know WCW was probably looking at the clock and realizing they needed to fill time, but surely they could've done so with some impromptu promos out of Paul E? Rude? Cactus Jack? Arn Anderson? Its not like WCW lacked talent that could cut promos on the fly. This would've been a good match, or at least average, if 2-3 minutes were shaved off. (2/5)

The last of the mix-em'-up tag matches is next - Ron Simmons teaming with Tommy Rich (who is dressed up like Barry Windham's Body Double) to take on PN News and Steve Armstrong. The only guy over in this match is Ron Simmons, so naturally, the bulk of it involves the other three guys. This might be one of the worst matches ever - not because it features any noticeable botches - but because it is maybe the longest twelve minute match ever broadcast. WCW could've booked this as a total squash and the crowd would've even it up, but because the show was probably running short on time, they opted instead to have Tommy Rich (a guy in the midst of the worst stretch of his 30+ year career) buy time with lame shtick. At twelve minutes, this one goes at least ten too long. (0/5)

Main event time - the first ever BattleBowl Battle Royal featuring all the winning teams from tonight's random pairing pseudo-tournament.  I thought the last match was one of the worst things I ever saw, but at least that was comprehensible. This match started like the worst part of the worst Royal Rumble that never happened as there were too many bodies in the ring and too many of said bodies were guys that shouldn't have even been on PPV (let alone in a main event). Plus, its double-elimination, so it takes twice as long to get Firebreaker Chip and Bill Kazmaier off the screen. Despite a few guys that are over and have some flashy movies (namely Sting, Liger, Simmons, Lugar, and Arn Anderson), there seems to have been zero thought put into how this match could spotlight of any of their talents before it whittles down to a half-dozen guys. The crowd pops for the pairings that one would expect - Rude and Steamboat trading shots and the eventual finals (Sting vs. Luger) - but even in its closing moments, its not a very interesting conclusion to watch. A worse than average main event in any era. (1.5/5)


With a Kwang Score of 1.77-out-of-5, Starrcade 91' is a tough show to sit through. While there's a bit of goofy nostalgic fun in seeing PN News and Arachnaman (or catching soon-to-be stars like Austin, Rhodes, and Vader so early in their runs), there's not a single match really worth watching on this entire show. The problem is that despite a tremendous amount of talent on this card, WCW unwisely decided to book the worst possible Lethal Lottery scenarios, opting to make things seem as random as possible rather than actually setting up teams that could produce good or interesting matches. Its a ludicrously stupid way to book a show as guys like Pillman, Rick Steiner, and Cactus Jack are kept out of the main event in favor of Todd Champion and Thomas Rich. Astoundingly, WCW would make this same mistake time and time again with their Lethal Lottery shows, though I'm not sure there was any worse edition than this one. Additionally, the show suffers tremendously from lacking any sort of diversity. There's not a single non-Lottery match on the whole show, meaning not a single match to break up the monotony of a bunch of "heel & face vs. heel & face matches," none of which are worked particularly well. Was there any way this show was ever going to work the way it was booked? 

FINAL RATING - DUDleyville