WWE WrestleMania V

WWE WrestleMania V

Atlantic City, NJ - April 1989

CHAMPIONSHIP RUNDOWN: Coming into this show, the WWE Champion was Randy Savage, the WWE Tag Team Champions were Demolition, and the Intercontinental Champion was The Ultimate Warrior. "Rockin'" Robin was the WWE Women's Champion, though her reign would come to a quiet, off-screen end as the title was de-activated when Robin left the company in 90'. 

Was it a rib to have "Rockin'" Robin sing "America The Beautiful" to start the show? It seems like it as she is just not a good singer.

King Haku vs. Hercules is the opening contest of this historic show from Trump Plaza. Hercules wrestling as a babyface is always a little jarring for me as I grew up with him being a heel. Neither of these guys are known for their scientific skill, but they both give spirited performances and really seem to be stepping it up for this show. Sure, there's a bearhug spot that quells the crowd's excitement a bit, but such was the style of the time and, as this was the opening contest, there was no need to go "all out" this early in the show. A solid opener. (2.5/5)

A fun Rockers vs. Twin Towers match follows that shows just how good everyone involved was, even One Man Gang/Akeem, who might have a career showing here (at least based on what I saw out of the guy). At one point he hits Jannetty with a clothesline that is about as stiff and swift as the one JBL made famous. Though the match only goes 8 minutes, they make the most of their time and, though they don't go over, The Rockers come out of this match looking like a team to watch in a very crowded field of good tag teams. What makes a match like this stand the test of time is that they don't steer away from the Big Guys vs. Little Guys story the way modern wrestlers seem to (with big guys now working like small guys and small guys using things like powerbombs and falcon arrows). This doesn't necessarily reach "must watch" territory, but its close. (3.5/5) 

Ted Dibiase takes on Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake. I wasn't expecting much out of this match as I've never been a huge Dibiase and think even less of Beefcake, but I'll give credit where credit is due: they are both over, the crowd is into this, and they both play their roles well enough that they had me engaged from bell-to-bell. The double count-ou finish is a disappointment, but then again, both guys needed to be kept strong and couldn't necessarily afford a clean loss (Beefcake would be in a spotlight position at SummerSlam 89' and Dibiase remained one of the company's top utility heels through 90'). An extra half-point for seeing Dibiase schmoozing with Donald Trump before the match, a visual that has aided rather nicely considering that they're both financial crooks. (2.5/5)

The Bushwhackers vs. The Rougeau Brothers followed. This was a clear "cool down" match as they only went five minutes and it involved the Bushwhackers who, in the WWE at least, were  just a filler team that got good a reaction for their entrance and very little else. I really like the Rougeaus, but they're much better when working against other athletic teams and given more time to do their heel shtick. These teams just did not click for me. (0.5/5)

Another relatively short match follows as Mr. Perfect takes on The Blue Blazer (Owen Hart). Perfect was a newcomer and had not yet been paired with Bobby Heenan. Considering the talents involved, this should've been a sleeper Match of the Night but as neither guy was particularly over and even the commentators barely cared, the match doesn't pack much of a punch. There are some cool moments that show how and why both guys would be much bigger deals down the line, but this isn't some hidden gem as much as I wish it were. I wonder if they worked each other later on in the 90s or if this was it as I could see it potentially having happened at some point when Owen was "The Rocket" and Perfect was still working or even later on in 93' somehow? (2.5/5)

Before the next match, Run-DMC perform. Their song, "WrestleMania Rap," is actually pretty dope and Run-DMC look like they're having fun in the ring, but the WWE was definitely a year or two late on bringing them in as they were definitely on the downturn of their popularity by this point. 

The next match is a 3-on-2 handicap match for the WWE Tag Team Championships as Demolition defend against The Powers of Pain and their manager Mr. Fuji. The build-up for this match was cool and I'm glad they include a pre-match video going through what brought us here. The match itself is less exciting as there's nobody in the ring that's particularly interesting and this is just a slugfest (not necessarily my cup of tea). When you're counting on a hot tag to Smash to revitalize a crowd that had already sat through five other matches and a musical performance, I'm not sure what you're expecting in terms of crowd responses. Demolition get the W in around 10 minutes, which felt like at least 2-3 minutes too long. Demolition had some good matches in their day, but this was not one of them. (1/5)

Dino Bravo vs. "Rugged" Ronnie Garvin is next. While both guys are in the ring, "Superfly" Jimmy Snuka makes his return to the company after some years off (?). Its awkward. Anyway, Bravo and Garvin have the type of match one would expect: not a good one. After a relatively strong start to this show, things went further downhill here as Garvin's overselling is distracting and Bravo has nothing going for him beyond his look, which, in 1989, could get you a long, long way. The crowd pops loudest for the post-match shenanigans as Ronnie Garvin beats up Frenchy Martin. (0.5/5)

Strike Force face The Brainbusters in the next contest. If they had cut out some of the crap matches off this card and just given these four the time, this could've been an all-time great match. Sadly, it doesn't live up to what it could be because it only goes for about 10 minutes. Still, the 10 minutes we do get shows that these two teams probably could've torn the house down if they were allowed to actually build a match the way Tully and Arn did in NWA. The most noteworthy thing about this match, though, is the brilliantly-executed heel turn from Martel who inadvertently gets struck with a Santana forearm and then walks out on his partner, which sends Gorilla into a tizzy on commentary. (2.5/5)

The next segment is an all-time classic Brother Love, Morton Downey Jr., and Roddy Piper create magic in the ring together. As a kid, most of the jokes went over my head, but watching this back now, it is an incredible segment that gets a huge reaction from the live crowd. I can see the argument that giving these guys 10+ minutes just to talk in the middle of a show that was already overloaded was a bad move, but it worked for me (as I admittedly watch these shows in chunks anyway). A classic Piper segment. (+1)

Big John Studd is the guest referee for the next match - Andre the Giant vs. Jake "The Snake" Roberts. Unsurprisingly, there's not much "action" in this match as Andre was nearing the end of his in-ring career and would only compete for another couple of years, mostly in tags and multi-mans if I'm not mistaken. There's a cool opening to this match as one of the turnbuckles is exposed and Jake gets sent into it right from the start. I wonder if the live crowd was even aware. They go through the usual spots that Andre did, barely bumping and getting caught in the ropes and just dominating in slow fashion while his opponent added the drama by spilling to the floor and whatnot. Ted Dibiase comes down and steals Jake's snake, but Jake follows him down the aisle. Meanwhile, in the ring, Andre goes at it with Studd, which leads to the eventual DQ but not before Jake unloads Damian and sends Andre out in fear. For what this was, its not nearly as bad as it could've been. A year later, Dibiase would face Roberts at WrestleMania VI, which is the kind of long-term storytelling that the WWE no longer bothers with. (2.5/5)

The Honky Tonk Man and Greg Valentine took on The Hart Foundation next. They had a decent match given the time they were given, but by this point, the crowd was restless and even Bret Hart's spirited offense wasn't enough to really pull them out of the lull. Honky Tonk Man hits his finish but doesn't make the cover, which gets him admonished on commentary by Gorilla. The Hart Foundation end up getting a not-so-clean victory when Jimmy Hart's megaphone ends up in the ring. (2/5)

The Ultimate Warrior defends his Intercontinental Championship against Rick Rude next in a match that stands as one of the all-time best "carry jobs" in WWE history. Rick Rude is just phenomenal in this match and though I'm not sure who help lay this one out - Pat Patterson maybe? - these two create magic from beginning to end despite Warrior's shortcomings. I love the way the match starts with Warrior tossing Rude repeatedly into the corner, I love the number of shortcuts that Rude has to take (all little things that more heels should be doing these days), and even though Warrior slows things down with bearhugs and looks to be pretty gassed by the end, the rest of his offense looks good and Rude's selling does make it seem like this sub-10 minute match is an all-out war. The finish is one of my all-time favorites too with Bobby Heenan helping to steal the championship by holding down Warrior's feet after a suplex attempt. This isn't a masterpiece but it is still in that "should watch" territory for me. The easy Match of the Night up till this point. (4/5)

"Hacksaw" Jim Duggan vs. Bad News Brown follows. This match only goes a few minutes, which is a good thing. After some tedious brawling, Brown grabs a chair and Duggan grabs his 2x4 and the ref throws out the match. (1/5)

The Red Rooster vs. Bobby Heenan is next in another match designed to cool down the crowd before the main event. This one is even shorter than the one that came before it, lasting less than a minute. Another waste of time on a show that had way too many filler matches. A half-point because it only lasted half a minute. (0.5/5)

Main event time - Hulk Hogan challenging "The Macho Man" Randy Savage for his WWE Championship. The build-up to this match is often talked about as one of, if not the, best long-term storylines in wrestling history so there was high expectations for this match. Of course, no amount of build can hide the fact that Hogan was a limited in-ring performer that got over due to his build and charisma. Fortunately, Randy Savage was every bit as charismatic and engaging as a performer, was an all-time great bumper and seller, and had a cinematic, detail-oriented view of wrestling that he would bring into his matches. Simply put, Savage knew what to deliver to the audience that night and Hogan plays his role perfectly so there's just not a single dull moment in this much-beloved classic. Savage is brilliant throughout, getting a ton of heat by using Miss Elizabeth as a shield and bloodying up the Hulkster. Hogan doesn't show off too much offense, but I like the subtle borderline heel stuff he does as it really makes this match seem more about the personal animosity than the championship. Anyone familiar with what the WWE was in the 1980s will not be surprised by the finish, which sees Hogan kick out of Savage's patented elbow drop, hulk up, and win the title. It is this predictability that prevents this from being a true classic as there is not a single moment in this match when it seems like the ending is in question. However, credit must be given to Savage for coming out of this match still a red-hot heel, as captivating as ever, a feat that not every Hogan opponent could accomplish after a loss (King Kong Bundy, Paul Orndorff, Earthquake) or even after a win (Ultimate Warrior). Nobody would ever mistake this for what Flair and Steamboat and Funk were doing in the NWA around this time, but this is still a "must see" Mania match and is certainly in the conversation for being in the top 25 Mania matches ever. (4/5)

Kwang Scores aren't always the best gauge of the watchability of a show - which is why I also include a "Final Rating" that doesn't always match the "quantitative value" of my scores. WrestleMania V is a good example of this phenomena. While its Kwang Score of 2.17-out-of-5 would suggest that this show is mostly boring, tedious filler (and there is an undeniable amount of bloat on the card), the World and Intercontinental Championship matches are excellent and "must see," the Rockers/Twin Towers match is a bit of a hidden gem, Piper's return is a classic segment, and if the wrestling isn't great, there's still something enjoyable in seeing Andre the Giant perform or the character clash of Brutus Beefcake and Ted DiBiase. I've read reviews that the show comes off as a glorified house show, but this just shows how stacked the WWE roster was at the time as there are at least a dozen Hall of Famers on this show, many of whom were in their prime. 

FINAL RATING - Watch It...With Remote in Hand

WWE Royal Rumble 2022

WWE Royal Rumble 2022

St. Louis, MO - January 2022

CHAMPIONSHIP RUNDOWN: Roman Reigns was the Universal Champion coming into the show while Bobby Lashley was the WWE Champion. The Intercontinental Champion was Shinsuke Nakamura, though he would not defend the title on this show. The United States Champion was Damian Priest, the RAW Women's Champion was Becky Lynch, and the SmackDown Women's Champion was Charlotte Flair. The Usos held the SmackDown Tag Team Titles and Alpha Academy (Otis and Chad Gable) were the RAW Tag Team Champions. Carmela and Queen Zelina were the Women's Tag Team Champions too, though, they'd had only one defense since winning the titles in late November. 

The 2022 Royal Rumble kicked off the Universal Champion, Roman Reigns, defending against his former stablemate, Seth Rollins. Rollins came in as the pseudo-face, playing mind games with Reigns by rocking his Shield attire and coming in through the crowd. It was a nice touch that the live audience loved, though I'm curious if this (and the post-match beatdown by Roman) is going to lead to a full-fledged babyface run for him. Personally, of all the iterations of Seth Rollins we've seen, his babyface work has never been my different. Anyway, this was a very solid opener with some good near falls that the live crowd bit on despite it being fairly obvious to me that the company has no intention of having Reigns anywhere but WrestleMania and, very possibly, not even there. I can't understand any sort of argument that Rollins should've won this match after the past couple years of him being a reliable, consistent performer but not to the point of being the one to dethrone the company's top, top guy. I'm not sure the DQ finish and post-match beatdown was needed as Reigns' focus for the next few months really should be 100% on his WrestleMania opponent and Rollins didn't gain anything by not losing anyway, though maybe this was done to set-up Rollins taking some time off and come back as a fan favorite? (3.5/5)

The 2022 Women's Rumble was next and began with Sasha Banks drawing number one and Melina returning at #2. Melina had tears in her eyes from the warm crowd response, but didn't last longer than a minute after, according to Cagematch, over a decade away from the WWE. Other surprise entrants included Ivory (doing her Right to Censor gimmick, which was fun), Molly Holly (who got LEVELED by Nikki ASH in what will hopefully set up at least a TV match between them), Sarah Logan (who was unceremoniously eliminated quickly by the Bellas), and Cameron (the former Funkadactyl, whose elimination by Sonya Deville continued the SmackDown GM's rivalry with Naomi). The biggest surprise, though, was the eventual winner - Ronda Rousey, who got the massive pop that should've been expected for such a high profile return. I loved the little moment Rousey had with Shayna Baszler, a partnership that would work well this time around now that Baszler is established on the main roster. I also dug Rousey spending some time roughing up the Bellas, a nice little nod to her history with those two. Bianca Belair and Rhea Ripley had good showings (as did the aforementioned Banks), both making it to the final 5 (along with Baszler). My guess is that Belair will end up challenging Lynch (with Rousey challenging Flair), but I wouldn't be surprised to see Ripley and maybe Doudrop or Liv Morgan added to that mix. Its also possible that Asuka or Bayley will play into the RAW Title scene, the WWE lucking into a situation where they've got quite a crew of challengers that could make for an interesting build towards Mania. This was a really strong Rumble that had a couple of through-lines that spotlighted a wide variety of talent, including legends like Michelle McCool and the Bellas, but also gave us some depth in the current rivalries between Ripley and Nikki ASH and Naomi and Sonya Deville. The surprise entrants paid off, the final 4-5 all came off as deserving to be there, and the crowd was hot from beginning to end. A really, really good Rumble that would be very tough for the men to outdo. (3.5/5)

Becky Lynch defended her RAW Women's Championship against Doudrop in a hell of a match (to my eyes), but not so well-received by the burned out live crowd or some of the reviewers I read. The Rumble was a tough match to follow and Lynch and Doudrop opted to go all out for a very respectable 15-minute match, delivering a physical title fight that would have likely benefitted from not being essentially a heel/heel contest. While the finish was never really in question, Becky's struggle felt real and I felt Doudrop did a solid job showing she belonged in the spotlight and could potentially be a great challenger for either title after WrestleMania, especially if she is presented as a monster going forward. A better match than fans upset about Rousey's win or other events on the show will likely have you believe. (3/5)

The WWE Championship was on the line next as Brock Lesnar defended against Bobby Lashley in something of a "dream match." As a fan of both, like many watching this show, this was the match I was most excited to see. Lesnar and Lashley traded suplexes early, Lashley sporting a busted lip within the first minute. Lesnar went for an F5 but Lashley escaped and delivered a pair of big spears, sending Brock to the outside. Lashley went to charge Lesnar through the barricade, but Brock dodged him and Bobby went to down hard to the arena floor. Lesnar attempted an F5 on the floor but, again, Lashley escaped and sent Brock into the post. Lashley went for a spear in the corner, but Brock dodged and Lashley hit the post. Lesnar wrestled Lashley out of the corner and hit him with another German Suplex and then a second one to put the total count to 4. Lashley delivered a 5th and then a 6th, with Lashley looking to be completely beat. The 7th German Suplex might've been the most violent, Lashley getting rocked onto the back of his neck. Lesnar went for an F5, but Lashley escaped and countered it with the Hurt Lock! Lesnar did a great job selling the move though I wish Lashley had had more offense in the minutes prior to really sell that Lesnar might lose. Lesanr eventually rammed him into the corner to escape and hit the F5, but the referee got clipped! Lesnar got the visual pin, the crowd counting all the way to 5, but the ref was knocked loopy on the arena floor. At this point, Roman Reigns showed up and speared Lesnar to a chorus of boos. Reigns stared down Heyman, who then handed Reigns the WWE Championship to strike Lesnar in the face with. Heyman left with Reigns as Lashley crawled over and got the cover, though it was clear that Lesnar was protected as the "better man" in this match pretty thoroughly. If this had been more even early on, it would've been even better. As it was, Lashley did not come out looking like a true equal to Lesnar or even to Reigns, which devalues the championship quite a bit in my eyes. Lesnar is so captivating that this was still in the average-to-good range even if it wasn't everything it could've been. (2.5/5)

In the "cool down" spot on the card was Edge and Beth Phoenix vs. The Miz and Maryse. Even for filler, this felt meaningless and the audience didn't seem too interested in any of it. Having Edge get the clean win at Day 1 was questioned by some fans weeks ago and the lack of drama in this match seemed to confirm that it was a bad idea as there was just nothing enjoyable or interesting about watching Edge and Phoenix beat down on the same heels they dominated a month ago. The crowd popped for an interaction between Miz and Phoenix, though, again, I kinda wished they had gone the other way with it and had The Miz cheap shot (accidentally or on purpose) Beth Phoenix to really draw some heat. Maryse took control after striking Phoenix with a loaded handbag, applying a camel clutch and then doing a nice counter sequence with the Glamazon that I absolutely did not expect. Edge came in on the hot tag, though, and the babyfaces retook control, Phoenix eventually dropping Miz with a powerbomb. Edge hit an elbow drop off the top rope for 2, the match continuing on despite not really needing to. Outside, Maryse attacked Phoenix as Edge continued his work on Miz. Edge went for the spear, but Maryse tripped him up and caused a distraction leading to Maryse hittingEdge with a hurricanrana and then dropping Phoenix with a DDT. Miz hit the Skullcrushing Finale but only got 2. I'll admit that I bit on that nearfall as that would've been a great finish to this match (even if it meant we'd have to watch another bout between these 2 teams). Edge and Phoenix hit a double spear on Miz and then delivered stereo Glam Slams to put this one to bed. This was a touch too long and started out rocky, but it eventually had the crowd's attention. While she wasn't the smoothest worker in the bout, Maryse might've stole the show with her scandalous outfit and dirty tricks. (2/5)

The main event followed with AJ Styles coming as the first entrant in the 2022 Men's Royal Rumble match. The early highlights included a nice TNA callback moment involving Roode and AJ, Montez and Sami Zayn coming out to big pops, and then the crowd basically dying once the ring filled up with guys like Damien Priest, Ridge Holland, and Austin Theory. Johnny Knoxville's entrance got a MASSIVE reaction that woke the crowd up as Knoxville ate a stiff clothesline from AJ and then a huge frog splash from Montez Ford. Holland set Knoxville up on the apron and Zayn struck with a Helluva Kick (only to get eliminated himself immediately after). Angelo Dawkins came out next, the ring apron showing the name "Montez Ford" again...which couldn't have made Dawkins feel very secure about his future. Omos arrived at number 11 and eliminated Dawkins quickly, then choke-shoved Ford out of the ring to a large amount of boos. Omos sent AJ into the ring post and then went to work on the rest of the field as Ricochet showed up at 12. Omos continued to dominate, though, tossing fools all over the place but not out of the ring. Gable came in and convinced everyone to team up against Omos, but that plan didn't work out too well as Omos eliminated Damien Priest (who probably shouldn't have been the guy sacrificed if you ask me). Dominick Mysterio came in and tried to help the whole crew of guys eliminate Omos, though it was a forearm from AJ Styles that finally did it. "Happy" Baron Corbin came in at #15, drawing some heat by eliminating Ricochet, followed by Ziggler, to crickets. On commentary, Cole noted that Austin Theory had been in the ring for 20+ minutes with Styles right there. Speaking of those two, AJ ended up eliminating Theory and then Ridge Holland mere seconds before Sheamus could get into the ring. Sheamus, vowing revenge, went right after AJ but then got sidetracked by Gable and Corbin. Rick Boogs showed up at #18 looking like Freddie Mercury. Boogs and Gable got a chance to do some big muscleman/comedy spots before Madcap Moss showed up at #19. The audience was back in a restless mood at this point as the ring looked a lot like a not-so-great episode of SmackDown. Boogs continued to show off his strength, though, at one point it sure looked like Ziggler might've been sandbagging a bit. AJ and Moss went at it in the corner, eventually leading to Corbin and Moss eliminating AJ to a huge amount of heat. The crowd seemed deflated by it, though the arrival of Matt Riddle got the crowd back into things. Boogs was the next to be eliminated by Corbin and Moss as Drew McIntyre came out at #21, returning from a neck injury. Pat McAfee mentioned that McIntyre would be out for a year, but I don't remember reading any of the sort and it seemed like the audience wasn't all that shocked to see him in the ring either. McIntyre eliminated Corbin and Moss in short order and then beat them up on the outside of the ring as well. Kevin Owens came in and went to work on anybody and everybody, showing his brutality by stomping on Riddle's bare feet. Mysterio came in next, the veteran delivering all sorts of signature offense to huge reactions and nearly eliminating Riddle before getting dropped by a Kevin Owens Stunner. Kofi Kingston came in at #24, a pretty late number considering that Big E was also slated to appear (logic would dictate you would want to spread out their arrivals). Kofi tried to come in off the top rope, but Owens absolutely MURDERED him with a shove to the barricade that Kofi sold like a million dollars. I'm not sure if that was a botch or on-purpose, which makes it all the more brilliant no matter what the answer is. Otis came in next, a guy who was a much bigger deal a couple years ago. Big E came out at #26 to a somewhat muted response - maybe because his new theme music is so indistinguishable compared to the New Day Theme? Big E hit some trademark offense but got Brogue Kick'd to the face to kill his momentum. At #27, Bad Bunny showed up. The audience seemed to want big surprises, but I'm not sure Bad Bunny was it, especially not once he started destroying nearly everybody in the ring, Canadian Destroy-ing Matt Riddle and then eliminating Sheamus and, with help from Mysterio, Dolph Ziggler as well. At #28, Shane McMahon returned, another guy that doesn't really have any business being in the ring but got a big reaction. Shane ended up eliminating Kevin Owens, which got a mixed reaction. At #29, the hometown hero, Randy Orton came out and it absolutely felt like they should've called the audible and give him the W (if it wasn't the plan already). Orton hit Big E with the RKO to eliminate him with relative ease, a shocking elimination, before doing the same to Otis (after Riddle used Otis's back to launch himself into the air to hit an RKO on McIntyre in a terrific spot). At #30, though, the crowd got a MASSIVE shocker as Brock Lesnar showed up. Lesnar eliminated Orton first to a huge amount of boos before Bad Bunny got taken out with an F5. Lesnar eliminated Riddle soon after efore struggling to clothesline a very blown-up Shane McMahon out. With only McIntyre left standing, Lesnar got his win back relatively quickly. There were much better ways to book to that same result as Lesnar had more than enough reason to challenge Reigns for the title at WrestleMania *without* winning the Rumble and the live audience clearly wanted to end this show with something like a "feel good" moment involving any number of guys. I'm a Lesnar fan so I'm not too upset with the ending, but this Rumble had some really questionable booking decisions and could've used some more intriguing surprise entrants. (2/5)

Some might say my Kwang Score of 2.75-out-of-5 is generous. I was higher on the Women's Rumble and Lynch/Doudrop matches than most (though not as enthralled by the mixed tag) and didn't completely hate the Lesnar/Lashley bout either. Still, this show will be remembered for its questionable booking more than any of the actual performances. If it had not been clear through 2021, Roman Reigns and Brock Lesnar were put over nearly every possible other star on the roster in one night. Ronda Rousey returned, but the "buzz" that came from her debut 5 years ago wasn't nearly as strong. As we'd come to learn less than a week after this show, Shane McMahon's surprise return caused more fireworks backstage than in front of the camera and he'd be fired by the end of the month. For any WWE fan, the annual Rumble is a "must see" based on its potential implications alone, but one has to wonder if the pay-off at WrestleMania is going to be worth sacrificing nearly every other male performer just to cement the already-known fact that Lesnar and Reigns are at the top and nobody else is even close.

FINAL RATING - High Risk Maneuver

WWE Royal Rumble 2000

WWE Royal Rumble 2000

New York City, New York - January 2000

CHAMPIONSHIP RUNDOWN: Coming into the show, the WWE World Champion was Triple H, the European Champion was Val Venis, the Intercontinental Champions were co-holders Chris Jericho and Chyna, Test was the Hardcore Champion, Gillberg was the Light Heavyweight Champion, Miss Kitty was somehow the Women's Champion, and the New Age Outlaws were the WWE Tag Team Champions. 

The show kicked off with one of the more memorable debuts in WWE history - Tazz taking on Kurt Angle. I remember watching this live and actually feeling a bit bad for Tazz. Tazz was able to debut in front of a loud, rabid, hot NYC crowd that recognized him from ECW and was primed for his first appearance. He got to beat Angle clean with his submission in under 5 minutes. His aura was intact. But...Kurt Angle, who had debuted just a few months earlier in November 99', was maybe the single biggest insta-star in WWE history, a guy who, in less than 3 months, was already being talked about as a can't-miss main eventer who was already within the top 3-4 best heels in the company and, in terms of freshness, was at number one. Here, as much as this match is about Tazz, Angle is the guy whose charisma, bumping, selling, and pre- and post-match shenanigans are what you remember. Not a "must see" match, but maybe a "must see" moment for any true WWE or even ECW fan. (3/5)

The Dudley Boys took on The Hardys in a Tables Match next. As expected, this was a wild brawl with some huge bumps from all four men and plenty of chair shots too, some of them as vicious as the ones The Rock hit Foley with a year prior. What makes this match work, though, is the escalation of violence from beginning to end, especially the "near misses" and table teases in the first few moments. The match only goes 10 minutes, but it feels like a real war because there is not a single second wasted. This is also my favorite version of the Dudleys: serious ass-kicker heels before the loaded their matches with too many gimmicky "cheap pop" cues like the "Wazzup" thing. While the TLC matches with Edge and Christian and the Hardys/Edge & Christian match from No Mercy 99' are more often cited as the best matches of this type, this is arguably just as good as any of those and would probably rank fairly high on a list of all-time best tables matches. The feel-good victory for the Hardys coming after another feel-good victory for Tazz feels like the kind of crowd-pleasing booking that Vince inexplicably resists delivering these days. (4/5)

Next up, the Ms. Royal Rumble Bikini Contest. This is a total trainwreck that has not aged well at all, though, to be totally honest, I would note that these sorts of filler segments would become even more gratuitous and tasteless in the years that followed. Also, in terms of crowd responses, this segment kept the already hot crowd sufficiently heated and engaged while also allowing for a break in action, something absolutely needed for a show with such a stacked line-up. Andy Richter is on hand but does not look like he enjoys any of this. Neither does Luna Vachon, who rightfully looks pissed to even be involved. Mae Young eventually shows up for the big ending, flashing the audience (though I'm not sure if she was actually topless or not). 

The Intercontinental Championship was on the line next as co-holders Chris Jericho and Chyna defended against Hardcore Holly in a triple threat match. Holly was included in this match because he had defeated both in singles competition in what I'm guessing were non-title matches, but this is really about the Jericho/Chyna one-upsmanship. The live crowd is 100% behind Jericho and boo everything Chyna does to cut him off. There's been quite a bit written about this stretch of Jericho's first WWE run as he had come in, got heat with "the boys" and famously Triple H despite being super over, and was reportedly paired with Chyna as a way to cool him down and "put him in his place." Of course, Chyna was, if not necessarily as popular as she once was and certainly not a great in-ring performer, still one of the most recognizable figures in the company so all this did was give Jericho a semi-prominent TV role that he proceeded to use to get even more over. At the same time, the pairing actually exposed Chyna a bit, her own charisma looking lesser compared to Jericho, arguably at his peak in terms of blending babyface clowning with fast-paced, hard-hitting wrestling. This match doesn't go a full 10 minutes and feels like a TV bout but, again, it ends in a satisfying note with Jericho getting the clean W. Above-average due to the hot crowd and some good sequences, with Holly looking better than I remembered him. (3/5)

The WWE Tag Team Champions, The New Age Outlaws, defend against The Acolytes next. This one doesn't even go 3 minutes, which is either because the Miss Royal Rumble pageant went too long or because Vince was nervous about killing the crowd with a match that was essentially heel/heel (though the Outlaws and their shtick was still quite popular with live crowds despite them being part of the McMahon-Helmsley Regime). Despite its brevity, the Acolytes get to show off their powerhouse moves and it actually seems like they might walk away with the titles before the Outlaws cheat their way to retaining. (1.5/5)

The WWE Championship is on the line next as Cactus Jack challenges Triple H in a no DQ streetfight. While Triple H had had some big matches before him (against The Rock at SummerSlam 98', against Mankind throughout 97') and had worked with some of the best in the company (Austin and Owen Hart throughout 98'), he was still relatively unproven as the top heel in the company despite winning his first WWE Championship in the summer of 99'. In that stretch, Triple H had had forgettable match after forgettable match and, while the angles and storylines were hot, there was an unmistakable sense that Triple H was still a tier down from being a true top guy. Anyway, Cactus Jack dominates early, overwhelming Triple H with strikes until they go to the floor and things start evening up. Triple H levels Foley with a chairshot, but Mick won't stay down and they end up back on the floor with Hunter getting back body dropped over the barricade. They go into the crowd and make their way over to the entrance, Cactus now using a trash can on the champion. They go back into the ring and we get the introduction of the barbed wire 2x4 which gets booted away by the ref only to be brought back into the action minutes later by Cactus Jack, who uses it to lacerate Triple H's head. I'm not sure if this was the first WWE match to feature barbed wire but I wouldn't be surprised to learn that it was. Like the table spots in the Dudleys/Hardys match, its hard to watch this match and not be a touch underwhelmed only because matches like this became "the norm" in the years that followed, but listen to the crowd reaction and check the pacing of this match and you'll see why this one holds up and could never really be replicated. They end up back on the floor and we get a table spot and then even more brawling leading to a classic Foley bump into the steel stairs. Triple H then grabs a pair of handcuffs, a callback to the Mankind/Rock match from the previous year's Rumble. This time, though, it is noticeable that Foley has protected himself a bit by not getting cuffed behind his back and the cuffs are "looser," allowing him to actually protect himself and fight back. Triple H grabs a chair and literally breaks it over Foley's back in another cool visual. Foley looks to be in real trouble until The Rock comes out in a questionable booking decision. The Rock hits Triple H with a chair to help out his buddy, though I wish they would've come up with a more clever way to reverse the tide than a run-in. Foley, freed from his cuffs, now looks to have the advantage and hits Triple H with a piledriver on the announce table (though it doesn't break, which always makes it seem a bit worse actually). Mick dumps Triple H back into the ring and brings out a back of thumbtacks (again, I'm not 100% sure this is the first WWE match to feature thumbtacks, but I'd wager it was). Foley wants to drop Triple H into the tacks, but Triple H ends up back body dropping him onto them instead! Triple H then hits a pedigree, but somehow Cactus Jack kicks out! This draws a massive reaction from the New York crowd. Triple H then delivers a pedigree onto the tacks, a finish that was absolutely insane for a major wrestling company to do in 2000 even if the deathmatch style had been around for decades. If Rock/Mankind is hard to watch because of the excessive chair shots, this one is much funner to watch as the brutality is more balanced and the work is undeniably safer (a thumbtack in your back is obviously painful, but a concussion can have serious long-term ramifications). This is an interesting match to consider if one were to make a top 100 list of WWE matches ever. I'm not sure it would rank in the Top 10 or the Top 20, but somewhere around #50 sounds about right even if that seems low considering how influential this match was and, if one could transport back to 2000, how mind-blowing this match was for its time. Also, unlike the aforementioned Rock/Mankind match from 1999 or Foley's infamous Hell in a Cell match against Undertaker, this was an actual match and not a stunt show (though I'd put his match against Shawn Michaels from Mind Games ahead of it). But it doesn't really matter where this one "ranks" or whether it is a masterpiece or just a near-masterpiece, it is absolutely must-see and a very entertaining 30 minutes of wrestling. (4.5/5)

Main event time - the 2000 edition of the Royal Rumble match. In a bit of a letdown, our opening two are D'Lo Brown and "Grandmaster Sexxay" Brian Christopher, not exactly main event level talent. Still, because this was the WWE in 2000, the crowd doesn't shit on them or on the number 3 entrant: Headbanger Mosh. The first big entrant is Rikishi at #5, but this is still months away from the heel turn and "I did it for The Rock" promo that was supposed to launch him into singles success (and didn't). The ring starts filling up with even more guys that stand no chance of winning - Boss Man, Test, British Bulldog, Bob Backlund (a nice bone to throw to the old school NYC fans) and a young Edge. Chris Jericho comes in at #15 to the largest pop yet but, as he was Intercontinental Champion, I doubt anyone believed he could win this. Chyna comes in not too long after, marking the second time she appeared in a Rumble (I think? Or maybe the 3rd time?). Regardless, this match is really all about The Rock anyway as Austin was injured and the Undertaker was also nursing injuries that kept him working in mostly tags in December 99' and then out entirely from January into the late spring of 2000. With those two stars out and Triple H having no real rivals aside from The Rock (and Foley), it was fairly obvious who would be getting the W. The Rock comes in at #24 to work the home stretch and gets the biggest pop of the match (as would be expected). Big Show comes in at #26 and Kane at #28, both of whom were kayfabe favorites but were certainly not viewed as realistic options to headline WrestleMania (Big Show's first couple years in WWE were an undeniable letdown fraught with odd booking decisions, an awkward pairing with the Undertaker, weight/mobility issues, and an emphasis on comedy that all but killed as credibility as a serious monster). Eventually, it comes down to The Rock and Big Show after some shenanigans involving DX and Kane. Big Show looks like he may have the match won but The Rock manages to hold onto the ropes and Big Show goes tumbling over the top. As I wrote earlier, this was another damaging loss to Big Show as he was once again presented as an underachieving oaf who couldn't win "the big one." The crowd goes home happy, though, as The Rock was headed to WrestleMania to challenge Triple H. Of course, because these two had already wrestled countless times and Foley was still super popular and Vince was still hoping to get more out of his investment in Big Show, a simple HHH/Rock main event at Mania was not what we ended up getting...but that's a story for a different review. (2.5/5)


With a Kwang Score of 3.08-out-of-5, the 2000 Royal Rumble might be overrated by some, but for its day, it was widely considered to be one of the best top-to-bottom WWE pay-per-views of not just the Attitude Era but any era. The WWE Championship match is a deservedly hailed as a career match for Triple H and one of Foley's best too, while the Dudleys/Hardys bout is a slept-on gem. The Tazz/Angle opener is arguably "must see" based on the atmosphere and buzz alone, still palpable on rewatch. The main event is not one of the better Rumbles ever, but its far from one of the worst despite a noticeable lack of star power or big surprises. 

FINAL RATING - Watch It...With Remote in Hand

WWE Royal Rumble 99'

WWE Royal Rumble 99'

Anaheim, CA - January 1999

CHAMPIONSHIP RUNDOWN: Coming into the show, the WWE Champion was Mankind, the Intercontinental Champion was Ken Shamrock (who was also co-holder the Tag Team Championships with Bossman), the Hardcore Champion was Road Dogg, the European Champion was X-Pac, Sable was the Women's Champion, and the Light Heavyweight Champion was Duane "Gillberg" Gill.

The Road Dogg takes on Bossman in the opening contest. I wasn't expecting much out of this match as I'm not a big fan of Road Dogg and while I think Bossman is underrated by many modern fans, I wouldn't necessarily point to any of the work in his last few years in the WWE as a great representation of what he did best. That being said, this is better than I expected even if it still isn't something I'd necessarily even call "good." Regardless of what I thought of his in-ring skill, Road Dogg was undeniably over and he gets big responses for all of his signature spots. Bossman, the consummate pro, helps stretch this match out and draw the audience in. Not an all-time great opener, but passable, and its important to remember that even though this was the first match of the pay-per-view, many fans had already sat through a full episode of Heat that featured big names like Foley and Austin so a "cool down" match to start the show makes some sense. (2/5)

The Road Dogg's tag partner, "Mr. Ass" Billy Gunn takes on Ken Shamrock for his Intercontinental Championship next. On one hand, the fact that this show starts with three consecutive DX matches is ridiculous and shows some real laziness in booking, but, on the other hand, at this point in time, DX were the most over babyfaces on the roster not named Austin or Foley. Anyway, I wish this had just been a dominant ass-kicking by Shamrock, but he was never really allowed to do that despite being more legitimate as a fighter than anyone else on the roster. Instead, him and Gunn have a relatively straight-forward back-and-forth match that involves some ref shenanigans and a run-in by Val Venis, who was also tangentially involved in this because of his relationship with Ken's kayfabe sister Ryan Shamrock. The right guy wins, but if I recall correctly, Billy Gunn ended up with the Intercontinental Championship not too long after this. (2/5)

As mentioned in the previous paragraph, the WWE opted to have the third member of DX, X-Pac, compete next, defending his European Championship against Gangrel. This was just a poor layout for a show as, despite the style differences between Road Dogg, Gunn, and X-Pac, they all did similar shtick around this time. This was arguably the best match-up of the three, but it felt like filler because, as far as I recall, there was no real storyline here. I was legit shocked to read that Gangrel was still working in the WWE through 99' and 2000 as I thought he was released once Edge and Christian (and then the Hardy Boyz) dropped him in late 99'. Like Essa Rios, it looks like a bunch of his screentime in the end there was on Jakked. Whatever. Not a bad match, though there is a botched pinfall where Teddy Long clearly makes the 3 count but the match continues and the small portion of the crowd paying attention gives him shit for it. X-Pac wins in under 6 minutes, making this seem more like a TV match than something PPV worthy. (2/5)

After some words from DX backstage, Shane McMahon made his way down the aisle to welcome "the next WWE Women's Champion" Luna Vachon as she challenges Sable in a strap match. Sable was not a trained wrestler so Luna has to carry this one entirely and does a decent enough job with it, though this isn't as good as the Marc Mero/Sable match I reviewed some months back. The match doesn't overstay its welcome, but you can tell that nobody involved really wants to be doing it either. Luna seems a bit unmotivated - maybe because her role here is so one-dimensional as the "not hot" one? Maybe there was some jealousy/anger over Sable being so prominently featured despite not actually being a trained wrestler? Maybe Sable's ego was running wild backstage and Luna didn't want to appease her? Maybe I misread this one, but it just seems like Luna had more fun when she was paired with Goldust and the Oddities and their "otherness" was actually celebrated while Sable, who would leave the company not so soon after, is clearly not super comfortable even working a match. Not a good outing for either performer, but I guess its at least kept short? (1/5)

Next up: one of the most historic and horrific matches in WWE history, The Rock vs. Mankind in an I Quit Match for Mankind's WWE Championship. Its difficult to write about this match in 2022 as it is the type of match that no major company would put on, not because its bloody, not because its violent, but because it features over a dozen unprotected chair shots to the head. It is remarkable that Mick Foley didn't suffer a traumatic brain injury here. The first 3/4s of the match are good, straight-up brawling and, considering some of the bumps and spots that they deliver and the crowd's huge reactions, it really makes the final 4-5 minutes harder to watch. If you take those unprotected chair shots out of this match, you have a very good Attitude Era match - arguably a "must watch" match on its own just because of the chemistry between Foley and The Rock, who puts in a performance that cemented his status as maybe the best heel working at the time. But Foley wasn't happy with just delivering a good match at this point. He wanted to deliver something that most fans had never seen before, a match that was as hardcore and violent and cringe-inducing as anything that had ever been done in a WWE or any American ring ever. He succeeds and it is a gruesome sight to behold as Foley, handcuffed, somehow takes one skull-crushing chair shot after another. I'd have to double-check his book, but I believe Foley's only issue with The Rock's work was one of the final chair shots, which The Rock delivers with Foley's back turned to him (giving Foley no real warning that it was coming). Was it unprofessional? Absolutely...but, then again, this level of barbarism is kinda what Foley had clearly wanted to happen. The Rock gets trigger-happy, but as Foley admits, he's the one that gave him the loaded gun and agreed to having himself handcuffed to eliminate any chance he had of protecting himself. So how does one rate a match like this? Is it "must see"? Is it a "masterpiece" of masochism? What about the cheap finish that involved The Rock essentially just signalling someone in the back to cue up a recording of Foley saying "I quit" from a previous interview while Foley clearly lies half dead on the ground? It would be insulting to not appreciate Foley's sacrifice here, or how hot the crowd is for all of this, how pitch-perfect The Rock's heel act is from beginning to end, and the emotional weight of a match like this. This is a match that one can not watch without having a visceral response to, even if that response is ugly and negative. For those reasons, I'd consider a "must watch." Thankfully, there is only one of these matches in WWE history, but that quality, that "singularness" is also what makes it a match that every wrestling fan old enough to appreciate what they're watching and what Foley put his body through should definitely see at least once. (4/5)

Main event time - the 1999 edition of the Royal Rumble. As had been hyped all night long, the match begins with Steve Austin and Vince McMahon as #1 and #2 (I forget who was which), Stone Cold stomping a mudhole in Vince's ass as the crowd went wild. Golga of the Oddities came in at #3 but was almost immediately eliminated by Austin. Golga was played by John Tenta, who was out of the company before the end of the year and sadly passe away in 2006 (but who is also something of a personal favorite of mine now that I've gone back and seen just how much presence and charisma he brought to his matches even if he doesn't have the glowing resume of a Vader or Bam Bam Bigelow). McMahon uses Golga's appearance as a distraction and runs off with Austin in hot pursuit...which kinda kills the Rumble match itself as Austin, the biggest star in the match, and Vince, the biggest heel in the match, aren't around the next little while (Austin is beaten up and pushed into an ambulance and Vince joins the commentary team). In there absence, we get a parade of guys that essentially had no chance of winning the Rumble anyway: Edge, Legion of Doom-era Droz, Billy Gunn, Steve Blackman, Tiger Ali Singh... There are occasional cool moments that advance some of the company's major storylines at the time - Kane getting into with a bunch of orderlies (if I recall correctly, Vince McMahon had ordered for Kane to be taken to an institution on Raw), The Undertaker and his Ministry of Darkness abducting Mabel (he would become known as Viscera soon after), Chyna eliminating Mark Henry. The final four is a complete letdown, though, as not having Kane or Undertaker around really made it obvious that either Austin was winning or there was going to be some sort of screwy finish. The latter is what we get as Austin manages to eliminate Bossman, D'Lo Brown, and Owen Hart but, due to a distraction from The Rock, Vince McMahon ends up dumping Austin over the top to win the match. In terms of progressing a storyline, this was an effective way to further the Austin/Vince storyline, but it really didn't do much for anyone else. It also didn't make a ton of sense that members of McMahon's Corporation didn't team up throughout the match; having Bossman, Shamrock, and Test as the final 3 would've added some drama that was definitely needed by the end of this match. With too many boring stretches and not enough stars, this was not a Royal Rumble I'd ever bother revisiting. (1.5/5)

Regarded by many as one of the worst Rumbles ever, this show is also undeniably one of the most memorable Rumbles ever. The WWE Championship match is legendary for its brutality, but if you can get past the ultra-violence, Mick Foley and The Rock's performances are undeniably brilliant and the match is, for better or worse, essential viewing for any WWE fan (though, maybe not the young ones). The Rumble match itself is certainly in the conversation of the worst ever, though I could hear the argument that, from a storyline perspective, it did everything it needed to in order to build towards the next pay-per-view (St. Valentine's Day Massacre) and, ultimately, WrestleMania XV, while still placing one more hurdle in front of Austin. With a Kwang Score of 2.08-out-of-5, this is a one-match show (for those that can stomach watching someone eat a dozen unprotected chairshots to the head) and not much else to recommend checking out.

FINAL RATING - High Risk Maneuver

WWE Day 1 2022

WWE Day 1 2022

Atlanta, GA - January 2022

CHAMPIONSHIP RUNDOWN: Coming into the show, the WWE Champion was Big E, the Universal Champion was Roman Reigns, the Intercontinental Champion was Shinsuke Nakamura, the United States Champion was Damian Priest, the RAW Women's Champion was Becky Lynch, the SmackDown Women's Champion was Charlotte Flair, the RAW Tag Team Champions were Randy Orton and Matt Riddle (RK-Bro), and the SmackDown Tag Team Champions were The Usos. The Women's Tag Team Champions were Carmella and Queen Zelina, who won the titles in late November and, as of February 18th, only defended them one time since.

The SmackDown Tag Team Champions, The Usos, took on The New Day in the first ever Day 1 match. This had to be their hundredth match together and while they usually bring the goods and the live crowd was into this, I was underwhelmed. There were some nice near-falls and they got loads and loads of time, but its hard to get excited when you've had this same meal - as tasty as it may be - as many times as we've had this same meal. As the match stretched on I actually wondered if we'd get some sort of time limit finish to further cement how equal these teams are but that was not the case as the Usos got the clean W with a variation on the Dudley's old finisher. (3/5)

After a hype video for Big E and some comments from Kevin Owens, it was time for Drew McIntyre vs. Riddick "Madcap" Moss. The crowd was dead for most of this match aside from McIntye's signature offense. Some writers and fans have really praised Baron Corbin for his new "Happy" Corbin gimmick, but I didn't hear anything in his pre-match promo or Madcap's moments on the mic that would make me think these two are worthy of PPV time even when you've got a depleted roster. This is the sort of match I would've skipped if it were on TV, which is maybe why I don't watch much of the TV programming anymore. If McIntyre is going to be getting a big push towards WrestleMania, they need to find opponents for him that are worthy or go the opposite route and have him start squashing jabrones like Madcap Moss, who gets minimal reaction and isn't interesting enough in the ring to warrant a spotlight yet. (1.5/5)

The RAW Tag Team Champions, RK-Bro, defended the titles against The Street Profits next. This was another so-so match that seemed to lose the crowd for extended periods, maybe because it, again, felt like a repeat of a match that has likely been on TV multiple times over the past year? Orton seems to be having fun in this tag team, but "fun" doesn't really mean the same as depth and, with the company so rudderless right now, it does still seem like a placeholder spot for a guy that, not too long ago, had a well-received feud with Edge and a slightly underrated rivalry with McIntyre that, if it had been booked properly, would've cemented McIntyre's title reign even more that it did. I've softened my stance on alleged sex creep Matt Riddle, but I also no longer see him as any sort of fool-proof future main eventer like I might have when he first debuted. Meanwhile, the Street Profits, like the New Day and Usos, are a team that works hard and generally knows how to keep a live crowd engaged but already seems very "skippable" on TV, another team suffering from hamster wheel booking and no real direction or development. This was a fine match, but nothing remarkable. (2.5/5)

Edge vs. The Miz followed in a match that was a miss for me. I'm far less critical of The Miz than most, but this match didn't play to his strengths one bit. There is just no real reason why The Miz should be working 20-minute matches (even on a card that obviously was missing a main event). While the crowd stuck with them, this wasn't nearly as hot a match as it could've been had it been a little bit tighter and a notch less "epic." The Miz's best matches, by my account, have often included either a whole ton of shenanigans and weaponry and gimmicks or they've been against superworkers - Cesaro at Payback 2016, Danielson at SummerSlm 2018, Sami Zayn and Dolph Ziggler. Having to fill so much time with Edge, another guy who has always shined brightest when he's been (a) working as a heel and (b) allowed to sprinkle his matches with ladder, table, and chair spots, was a recipe for tedium and that's what this match was for me. Seeing Beth Phoenix arrive to help even the odds was a crowd-pleasing moment, but with Edge already winning fairly decisively (and even kicking out of the Skull-Crushing Finale), I don't see what the point of stretching this storyline any further is aside. Then again, I'm not sure I really see what the point of stretching Edge's return any further is either as, at this point, is there a single "dream feud" left for him? Sami and KO would've been interesting but only with Christian involved and I don't see Edge going heel to give the rub to someone like Big E, who could absolutely use it. Oh well. Not a good match due to its length. (2/5)

Liv Morgan challenged Becky Lynch for her RAW Women's Championship next. This was a big step up from every match that came before it as it felt like the audience was fully behind Liv and her and Lynch had good chemistry without ever delving into making things seem overly cooperative. Liv Morgan had some strong offense at times, but still hasn't put together the full package to be at the top of the Women's Division. I doubt that Morgan is going to challenge at WrestleMania which does make things intriguing as to what direction they will go at the Royal Rumble, but then again, if she can find a way to stay relevant and over with the live crowds, there are way worse options. Becky Lynch has never been the most spectacular worker, but her timing and ability to draw in the crowd is what makes her special and it was on full display here. I still think the heel turn was a tad unnecessary as no matter how much Lynch trolls the crowd - both in-person and at home - I still find myself rooting for her in a way that I've never rooted for Charlotte or Sasha. The match of the night up till this point. (3.5/5)

Main event time - Big E defending the WWE Championship against Seth Rollins, Kevin Owens, Bobby Lashley, and (because his scheduled opponent, Roman Reigns, was out due to a positive Covid test) Brock Lesnar. How long does a great match need to be to be considered truly great? This one went under 9 minutes but every single second of it was excellent...unless you were super invested in Big E's Championship reign, in which case, the final 3 seconds probably left you upset. As I am way too cynical about the WWE's current booking, I wasn't shocked by the outcome, which saw Brock Lesnar eventually deliver a whole slew of F5s in order to capture the gold. But, again, the other 8 minutes and 17 seconds were terrific and saw everyone basically gunning for Lesnar, who put on a terrific performance and sold like a champ for everyone else. (4/5)

With a Kwang Score of 2.75-out-of-5, Day 1 was a fine show, but not one I would ever see anyone needing to revisit. The main event was fun for what it was, largely because of Brock's aura and the demolition derby-on-speed layout, every single second of its sub-10 minute runtime being glorious. Unfortunately, the rest of the show mostly paled in comparison (though Morgan/Lynch was as good a match as Morgan as had and the opener was above-average if not necessarily fresh). If you're not a fan of modern WWE and aren't a Lesnar fan, this show will have nothing to offer.

FINAL RATING - High Risk Maneuver

WWE In Your House #3: Triple Header

WWE In Your House #3: Triple Header

Saginaw, MI - September 1995

CHAMPIONSHIP RUNDOWN: Coming into this match, the WWE Champion was Diesel, the Intercontinental Champion was Shawn Michaels, Yokozuna and Owen Hart held the World Tag Team Championships, and Bertha Faye was the Women's Champion.

Savio Vega vs. Waylon Mercy is our opening contest. I would've sworn that Mercy debuted in 94' and was already out of the company by now, but I was wrong. Spivey has a low-key fascinating career having been broken into the business by Dusty Rhodes, then working in the WWE in the 80s, NWA/WCW in the early 90s, and back to the WWE in 95' in a variety of singles and tag roles. But as interesting as his life might've been, his in-ring prowess was never as captivating to me and this match didn't do much to change that view. Vega ends up getting the victory in under 10 minutes which did nothing for Mercy (obviously) but also very little for Vega as, despite being undefeated before this match, this is Mercy's first pay-per-view appearance so he doesn't seem like the big deal he could've/should've to make Vega's victory feel meaningful. Unremarkable opener. (1/5)

Next, Sid vs. Henry O. Godwinn. The build-up to this match was all about Godwinn slopping Sid (and DiBiase?) on TV prior to this show and Sid hitting Godwinn with a powerbomb on the arena floor, which would've been a big deal at the time but I don't recall it at all (then again, I wasn't really watching much wrestling from roughly late 92' until WrestleMania XII in 96'). This is a much more even match than Sid should've been having, no matter how underrated Godwinn might've been as a worker. His gimmick was one-dimensional and Sid was, at one time, a WrestleMania main eventer and would be used as one again in the future so he should've just demolished Godwinn here. Instead, there's more back-and-forth than needed and Godwinn even gets to hit his finisher and get a 2.9 nearfall. Sid would hang around for the next couple months but then disappeared from late 95' until the summer of 96', which, planned or not, helped him tremendously as feeling like a big deal again when he came back. Not good. (1/5)

Bam Bam Bigelow, who appeared just minutes earlier doing a run-in during the post-match bit in the last match, takes on Davey Boy Smith, who had recently turned heel, in the next match. These two get a fair bit of time and the match worked for me, mostly because Bulldog was getting a rather sizable push (which made him motivated) and Bigelow was almost always a reliable hand who seemed to be getting positioned to challenge Sid (in what would've been a relatively big midcard feud). Cornette is not in the Bulldog's corner as the storyline of the night - Owen Hart missing and Cornette needing to find a last minute replacement partner - has kept him busy backstage. I like Bulldog working on Bigelow's knee and Bigelow selling the damage while still being able to throw his ample weight around to put up a tremendous fight. As others have reported, this was the time in the company when the Clique had a ton of power over the booking and presentation of the show and, as Bigelow wasn't part of that inner circle, he found himself - like Sid and Bret and Jarrett and others - in the midcard despite arguably deserving a spot higher up the card. A solid enough match. (2.5/5)

Bob Backlund, who had moved onto his Presidential Nominee gimmick, comes out to introduce the man challenging Razor Ramon tonight - Dean Douglas! This is another example of Razor Ramon not being anywhere close to the level of worker that some ascribed him to be when he was mega-over in 97' and 98' and some folks - myself included - were clamoring for him to get a run with the World Championship. Truthfully, match for match, he was just too dull and lazy, a master at dragging matches out but not necessarily making those matches as riveting from bell-to-bell as a truly great worker like Bret, Shawn, Austin, Foley, or others. Hell, take away the ladder matches and I'm not sure Hall actually has a better resume than Kevin Nash really. Here, he and Douglas get close to 15 minutes and there are spells when this match works, but there are also boring, submission-based stretches and it all culminates in a disappointing finish involving 1-2-3 Kid that makes the whole preceding match feel like a waste of time. (2/5)

Bret Hart vs. Jean-Pierre Lafitte is a bit of a hidden gem, though most fans of this era of the WWE and of Bret specifically are likely familiar with this tremendous contest featuring some wild spots including Bret nearly paralyzing himself before the bell even rings with a suicide dive. Later in the match, Lafitte does a ridiculous senton onto the padded floor from inside the ring that remains as spectacular a bump in 2021 as it was in 95'. It really is night-and-day watching what Bret does against Lafitte, making him look like an absolute killer, and how Shawn Michaels and Razor Ramon tended to work with Jarrett, Douglas, and others as they just seemed to outshine and overshadow them rather than actually building them up (no matter how many people love the Michaels/Jarrett match from a few months before this, Double J didn't come out of that match better than he went in). Speaking of the Clique members, Lafitte was supposedly released not long after this based on disagreements with them about the finish of a house show match. That's a shame because Lafitte is terrific in this match and, as he was just 28 at the time, he clearly had potential to be a solid midcard hand at a time when they needed him. The rest of his career involves stints in WCW, ECW, and a return to the WWE, but its his more recent renaissance (wrestling under something closer to his given name - Pierre Carl Ouellet) that is most fascinating. A match worth checking out. (4/5)

Main event time - WWE Champion Diesel and Intercontinental Champion Shawn Michaels putting their titles on the line against WWE Tag Team Champions Yokozuna and Davey Boy Smith (replacing Owen Hart who was mysteriously "missing" the whole show), who also have their belts on the line. This is a fun match for what it is, though I do kinda wish Owen actually got to participate in it as he was on fire in 94' and 95' and often one of the best in-ring performers on any given show. HBK and Bulldog start things off, unsurprisingly, before we get a fun sequence involving Shawn and Yokozuna. I looked it up and Shawn and Yoko worked two times on Raw and though I've never seen those matches, if the chemistry they show here is any indication, I'm guessing those matches aren't half bad. There are other fun moments sprinkled throughout this match - a spot that sees Yokozuna squash Bulldog like a bug in the corner, Shawn breaking up a pin with his patented elbow drop, and a wild finish that sees Owen Hart appear out of nowhere only to get hit with the Jacknife and pinned despite not being in the match. Did you notice I didn't mention much about Diesel? At this point he was really drifting into the background of his own storylines despite being the champion as Shawn was becoming increasingly popular and Diesel's string of lackluster title defenses against Sid, Mabel, and others had not helped him one bit. Overall, not a bad match at all even if the finish doesn't make a ton of sense. (3/5)

Saved by the final two matches on the show, Triple Header isn't all too bad of a show, earning a Kwang Score of 2.25-out-of-5, which isn't all that low considering the WWE's roster in 1995 and the way these In Your House events were often booked around just a single major match. Bret's match is terrific and reason alone to fire this show up on the Network, but the main event delivers what it needs to also. I found the Intercontinental Championship match to be way too long, but fans of Hall and Douglas may have more patience for it than I did. 

FINAL RATING - Watch It...With Remote in Hand

WWE Backlash 2000

WWE Backlash 2000

Washington, DC - April 2000

CHAMPIONSHIP RUNDOWN: Triple H was the WWE Champion, Chris Benoit was the Intercontinental Champion, Eddie Guerrero was the European Champion, Dean Malenko was the Light Heavyweight Champion, Crash Holly was the Hardcore Champion, and Stephanie McMahon was somehow the Women's Champion. Edge and Christian were the WWE Tag Team Champions at the time, enjoying their first reign.

The show begins with the WWE Tag Team Champions, Edge and Christian, defending the gold against Road Dogg and X-Pac, who had re-formed as DegenerationX and were now heels. Edge and Christian were also heels, but because they were entertaining, they had more crowd support in this match. The right team gets the W after about 10 minutes in a middling match. This is around the time when the term "X-Pac heat" was beginning to come into fashion as X-Pac, despite being arguably the best and most consistent worker in DX, had also been so overexposed that nothing he did was interesting. Partnering up with Road Dogg didn't help matters as all as the D-o-double-g was a horrendous worker. Looking back, X-Pac needed to freshen up his act but it never happened. Not a terrible match or anything, just nothing work seeking out. (2.5/5)

The WWE Light Heavyweight Championship is on the line next as Dean Malenko defends against Scotty 2 Hotty. Scotty 2 Hotty's gimmick is one of my least favorite of all time, but I can't deny that he had sound fundamentals. Dean Malenko, meanwhile, is notorious for being an iceman in the ring who could never get his actual personality into his in-ring character. This match comes across as Hotty wanting to prove he could hang with a wrestler's wrestler like Malenko, but it just feels slightly "off" in the WWE setting where light heavyweight wrestling had never caught on and the Attitude Era had made actual wrestling matches something of a rarity. To their credit, Malenko and Hotty (god I hate that name) do get the crowd invested by the end and there are some terrific spots, including an insane finish that sees Malenko get the clean W with a DDT counter to a superplex. In the Observer, Meltzer gave this 4 stars and while I wouldn't go that far, it was still an above-average match that might've gone a hair too long for me. (3.5/5)

After two matches highlighting some of the WWE's best and freshest talents in Edge and Christian and Malenko, it was time for a piss break match pitting Big Bossman and Bull Buchanan against The APA. As JR notes on commentary, this match was not going to be your classic "wrestling contest" like what we saw in the previous bout but rather an all-out brawl. Unfortunately, it doesn't really deliver at that level. Buchanan was noticeably green and, like the opener, it is a bit odd to see two teams that are ostensibly heels working against each other and even more surprising that the crowd cares about it. This was the magic of the WWE from roughly 98' through 2001 as nearly everybody on the card was over beyond the level they had any right to be. Forgettable match but at least it doesn't run too long. (1.5/5)

Next up - a six-pack challenge for the WWE Hardcore Championship as Crash Holly defends against Matt Hardy, Jeff Hardy, Tazz, Hardcore Holly, and Perry Saturn. The WWE had not yet mastered multi-man matches the way they would with the Money in the Bank Ladder match a few years later, but this is still good, hardcore fun that plays to the strengths of the Hardy brothers especially but also the rest of these dudes, many of whom were no stranger to weapon-based wrestling. A madcap match that is wrestled with the unique stipulation that the only way the match could end was if Crash Holly was pinned or did the pinning. Its an interesting twist on what is usually a match built around everyone scrambling to pin anyone they can and there are moments that capitalize on that unique element - the Hardys arguing over who is going to get the pin and the clever finishing sequence most noticeably. This match isn't any sort of masterpiece but it makes any and every of the 24/7 Championship matches/segments of current times look like the steaming piles of shit that they are. (3/5)

The Big Show had debuted in the WWE in 99' after being one of WCW's biggest stars from 95' on, but had become a comedy wrestler by this point, impersonating various other wrestling stars. On this show, Big Show does his most famous impersonation, coming out as "The Showster" to the tune of "Real American" and wearing all of his real-life buddy Hulk Hogan's gear. I'm guessing that Hogan didn't take any offense to Big Show's imitation, but that's probably because Hogan benefited from having his name chanted by 20,000+ fans more than Big Show benefited from getting the cheap pop. Big Show's opponent is Kurt Angle, a guy that Show would work with again and again over the next half-decade. Here, Angle is working as the pinballing heel for the most part, selling for his much larger opponent and not even attemping the Angle Slam (a spot that he would pull off in future years as Angle became a more "serious" wrestler). Despite Big Show's career being a literal joke at this point, the right man wins as Angle was so entertaining that it didn't matter if he took an L to a legit monster. This is not a good "match," but it is one of the more well-known moments in Big Show's early WWE run and the crowd was hella into it. A hard match to rate but, in terms of entertainment value, its no worse than average. (2.5/5)

The next bout and the storyline that brought it to pass is not one that has aged particularly well -The Dudley Boys vs. Test and Albert (with Trish Stratus). The build-up for this match was all about Bubba Ray's infatuation with Stratus and his creepy desire to "get wood" around her by putting her through a table. Bubba's bizarre fetish was played to the hilt with both JR and Jerry Lawler inserting every possible innuendo possible to make it clear to the audience that this was some pseudo (or not so pseudo?) sexual thing. The Dudleys were known for working stiff and Test and Albert could dish it out as well as they could take it, but in what would become a recurring theme with the Dudleys, their matches were built entirely around table spots so, after a few minutes of good action, that seems like all the fans want to see. In the end, Test and Albert get the W, but its really just a bit of a misdirect as Bubba ends up hitting a neckbreaker on Test and then doing what everyone wanted to see - powerbombing Trish Stratus through a table and going into an orgasmic trance. It had only been a few years since the Owen Hart tragedy but Vince had no qualms having his commentators go into super-serious mode on commentary to play up Trish Stratus being potentially paralyzed by the bump she took. It is a very respectable and nasty looking powerbomb so kudos to everyone involved, but again, there's just something cringe-inducing about this entire storyline when you watch it 20 years later, the kind of thing that if you had this on your tablet screen on the gym while you were on a treadmill, you might fast forward through so that the people nearby didn't see what you were watching. The match itself was fine but not necessarily my style of action. The post-match got over huge with the live crowd, but again, isn't my sort of thing and wasn't even my sort of thing at the time when I was 16. (2/5)

Essa Rios (with Lita) challenges Eddie Guerrero (with Chyna) for the European Championship next. Essa Rios is an interesting figure in WWE history to me because I totally forgot that he was around for as long as he was, debuting in 1997 and making it all the way to 2001 (though I'm guessing he wrestled less than a 30 televised matches in those 3-4 years). Like the Malenko/Hotty match, there's just something slightly weird about seeing a WCW-like cruiserweight match on a WWE show even if the work itself is strong throughout. Rios is the least over performer in this match and its no surprise Lita would end up teamed with the Hardys sooner rather than later (with Rios disappearing off TV not long after this match). Guerrero and Chyna are the star act, though, even if Guerrero hadn't completely found his footing in WWE either, wrestling in tuxedo pants and trying out a new finisher in an airplane spin/neckbreaker combo that looked cool but could never be used against anybody other than a cruiser like Rios. Another good, above-average match on a show that had a number of them. (3/5)

Chris Benoit defended his Intercontinental Championship against Chris Jericho in the next match. Jericho cut a pre-match promo all about taking out politicians that sounded like it was written word-for-word by Vince McMahon. Rewatching Chris Benoit is not always easy, not just because of how his life ended but because Benoit, for years and years prior to his death, represented technical perfection and now, in 2021, that reputation of excellence might hold up in a vacuum but his matches do often suffer from not fully engaging the audience or telling the emotional story that a guy like Daniel Bryan is able to do while arguably performing at an even higher level in terms of wrestling acumen. Hell, having now re-watched a ton of Bret Hart's best work, I'm not sure Benoit ever really topped the Hitman or if he is that far ahead of a guy like Christian, who has proven to be his generation's Arn Anderson in some ways. While some of Benoit's matches no longer click with me the way they once did, this one absolutely delivered. Hard-hitting with some unreal spots and exchanges - including a crazy dive from Benoit onto the floor - and a finish that was all about building to their next match rather than delivering a definitive ending on a show that already had quite a few of those. I'm not sure this gets to "must see" level, but its close and, even without a strong ending, accomplished what it needed to in making both guys come across tough as hell. (3.5/5)

Main event time - The Rock challenging Triple H for the WWE Championship. Over on ProWrestlingForums, a reviewer called this The Rock's version of the famous Austin vs. Foley match from Over the Edge 1998. Its a bold comparison as that match was famously overbooked but also, in some ways, the best overbooked match of all time as Austin was up against every potential obstacle and still walked away with the belt. Here, The Rock has to deal with not only trying to beat long-time rival Triple H, but also Shane McMahon as the referee, Vince McMahon and Stephanie at ringside, and the all-night-cliffhanger of whether or not Steve Austin would be showing up to help (or, as JR notes on commentary, potentially cost The Rock the title as Rock and Austin had their own history to play off of). The audience is a bit cold at the start, noticeably chanting "We Want Austin" in the opening moments. I wrote about this phenomenon when I reviewed the Royal Rumble in 2002; Austin, even after the heel turn at WrestleMania XVII and The Rock's ascension, was enormously popular and almost untouchable in terms of live reactions. The Rock and Triple H work hard to get the crowd into their work, but nobody forgets that Austin is supposed to be involved and that we won't see a real finish until he shows up, which takes this match down a peg to me. The best spot is when The Rock delivers an uncanny Rock Bottom on both Triple H and Shane on a table on the outside, but I also love the late cameo by Patterson and Brisco. The roof blows off when Austin does show up, chair in hand, and decimates everyone except The Rock. In a nice moment that only further establishes Austin as the biggest star in a ring full of stars, the Rattlesnake isn't around for the actual finish, which sees Linda McMahon show up with Earl Hebner in tow. Linda slaps the taste out of Stephanie's mouth to a huge cheer and The Rock wins the title in a crowd-pleasing moment, celebrating in the ring until Austin shows up and tosses him a beer, both babyfaces enjoying that they've one-upped the McMahon-Helmsley regime. I'm not sure is this as "must see" as the Over the Limit match, partially because it is essentially a retread of that very match, but its still highly entertaining stuff even if does not cross the threshold of being an all-time great match. (3.5/5)

Widely considered one of the best WWE pay-per-views of its era, Backlash 2000 is a mostly strong show that offers plenty of variety even if some of the matches - the opener and APA tag match particularly - that don't quite work. Big Show/Angle and the Hardcore Championship match are fun in completely different ways, Benoit/Jericho is hard-hitting, the European and Light Heavyweight Championship matches seem out of place in a WWE ring but they're undeniably solid matches, and the main event caps off the show with tremendous star power and a memorable finish. With a Kwang Score of 2.77-out-of-5, this show gets...

FINAL RATING - Watch It...With Remote in Hand

WWE The Bash 2009

WWE: The Bash 2009

June 2009 - Sacramento, California

CHAMPIONSHIP RUNDOWN: Coming into this show, CM Punk was the World Heavyweight Champion, Randy Orton was the WWE Champion, the Colons held the Unified Tag Team Championships, and the United States Championship was held by Kofi Kingston. The Intercontinental Champion was Chris Jericho, Tommy Dreamer was the ECW Champion, Melina was the Women's Champion, and the Divas Champion was Maryse. 

The title of this show was a shortened version of The Great American Bash, NWA/WCW's long-running pay-per-view (and, prior to that, multi-date tour featuring wrestling matches and country music acts). This was the last Bash to appear on PPV, though the WWE did revisit it as a special edition of SmackDown in 2012 according to Wikipedia. 

The show kicks off with a Scramble Match for the ECW Championship. The Scramble Match, as a concept, had been the focal point of the Unforgiven 2008 show - a show that I got to attend with my buddies Adam, Tim, and Cy (shoutout) - here in Cleveland, Ohio. Anyway, Christian and Jack Swagger started the match off and, from there, were joined by Finlay, Tommy Dreamer, and Mark Henry, who had not yet entered his Hall of Pain run but was getting there. While I wouldn't call this match a revelation or anything, it was solid - which could be expected with the amount of talent and experience in the ring, Finlay and Christian specifically working as the glue to hold most every multi-man spot or sequence together. Unlike the Scramble matches I (only vaguely) remember from a year prior, this one was not heavy on pinfalls and title changes, which made sense and kept things believable - for example, Mark Henry quickly got a pinfall (and the title), but ended up getting pinned himself by Swagger when he got too ambitious and attempted an unnecessary splash from the top rope rather than just taking a random pinfall from one of his smaller opponent's finishers. Again, nothing really special here, but not at all bad. (2.5/5)

Next on the card was Rey Mysterio Jr. putting his mask on the line against the Intercontinental Champion, Chris Jericho, for Y2J's title. This one started off a bit slow and bland to me, but it simmers to a boil, heating up in its third act and really delivering the goods. Dave Meltzer gave this 4.5 stars in 2009, but I wouldn't go that  high on it. The chemistry is there and, by the end, we do get some innovative twists and turns (especially the clever double-mask finish), but I didn't find myself truly captivated until that last 5-6 minutes, with the first half of the match not delivering anything I found to be as thrilling. In some ways, because these two had so many matches in the years leading up to this, my view was tainted by the fact that it wasn't exactly a "fresh" match to me - remember, these two had wrestled on PPV and Nitro quite a bit 10 years earlier and proceeded to have random TV matches throughout the 00s - nor was the Mask vs. Title stipulation particularly intriguing as the outcome was easy to predict. Still, calling this any short of great is cutting it short, even if I don't think its an all-time Top 10 WWE Match, which is praise that I have seen heaped onto it elsewhere. I've even seen it called Jericho's best match and Rey's best WWE match - which also seems a bit hyperbolic when you consider both guys' resumes. Regardless, this one borders between "should-watch" and "must-watch," especially if you're a fan of either of these two. (4/5)

Dolph Ziggler has his first singles match on pay-per-view next - taking on The Great Khali, who he had stolen some victories over on SmackDown in the build-up to this show. Ziggler had been around the WWE for a couple years by this point, first as Chavo Guerrero's caddy and then as a member of the Spirit Squad. His series against Khali qualified as his first real "push" and watching the pre-match video and the match itself it does seem like Ziggler had the potential to be a big deal (corny ring name aside). Over the past 10 years, though, Ziggler's career has been a series of ups-and-downs separated by vast stretches of him just being there, usually in the midcard and usually making false promises about becoming the "top guy" he has never actually become. But enough about Ziggler, let's talk about this match - which is exactly what one would expect: a showcase for Ziggler's pinball bumping and selling, but also his heel tactics and cunning. With the match being No DQ, Ziggler tries to gain the upperhand with a chair, but even this is not enough to overcome Khali's size and power advantage. The finish comes when Kane shows up and inexplicably attacks Khali, giving Ziggler the easy pinfall victory. I don't recall where this storyline all leaded - I'm guessing a Khali/Kane showdown at the next PPV - but for what this was, it wasn't too terrible and established Ziggler as an opportunistic heel in under 5 minutes. (2/5)

The Colons were set to defend their Unified Tag Team Championships against Ted DiBiase and Cody Rhodes of The Legacy in the next match, but after being berated by Vince McMahon backstage for being a do-nothing GM, Teddy Long added Edge and Chris Jericho to the mix. This was some smart booking as this match, as is, really seemed to lack star power and probably would've been met with mostly crickets. The crowd chants for Christian at various points, which would've been undeniably cool but also would've essentially turned Edge babyface as there's no way the crowd wouldn't have been 100% behind the reunited E&C. The story of the match is more interesting that it probably has any right to be as the Colons and Legacy basically wrestle the first 8 minutes (of a 10-minute match) among themselves, neither team too eager to tag in the two former World Champions that are almost salivating to get into the ring and win the titles. The commentary on this show isn't too great - JR has zero chemistry with Todd Grisham (another reason the Mysterio/Jericho match is just slightly short of a full masterpiece in my eyes) - but here, they do a good job of making it clear that it will be game over for the Colons and Legacy if Edge or Jericho get a tag. When it finally does happen, the pop for the new champions is massive and feels like a big deal, instantly adding some credibility to the Unified Tag Team Championships (which were, for the next 9 months or so, treated like main event-level titles). (2.5/5)

Michelle McCool, accompanied by Alicia Fox, challenged Melina for the WWE Womens Championship in the next contest. This era of women's wrestling - from roughly 2006 through to 2014 - is completely ignored and forgotten by most fans as it was a real mixed bag. On one hand, you had Trish Stratus and Mickie James nearly stealing the show at WrestleMania 22 and, not too long later, Beth Pheonix could be relied upon to carry just about anyone on the roster to something passable. Michelle McCool's eventual team-up with Layla was entertaining. The drop-off from these talents was vast too as various talents who were far better suited to just be valets - Maryse, Maria, and the very green Bella Twins and Alicia Fox - were all put in the spotlight and, in many instances, just didn't have the skill or experience to win over crowds that were accustom to seeing women's wrestling as a joke. This match is not as good as most of the women's matches the WWE produces today - which is a great thing - but it is also not nearly as bad or botch-filled as one might expect. Melina and McCool's movesets aren't as sharp, innovative, impactful, or technically-sound as we routinely see from Asuka or Charlotte today and there still seems to be a clear expectation that they sprinkle their entrances and character work with not-so-subtle sexual overtones (see Melina's trademark split is the easiest example to spot) that, say, Becky Lynch and Bayley and Sasha Banks haven't had to or haven't felt forced to utilize but nothing feels overly choreographed either. McCool and Melina are selling the action well throughout. There is a genuine feel of competition and physicality and athleticism. There are actual submission holds. They don't get many minutes, but they make things count and there's a beginning, middle, and end to the match. This isn't a forgotten gem or anything, but its also not as embarrassing to watch as what the company was promoting and producing 5 years earlier, when it seemed most of the action was built around bras, panties, and bikinis. (2.5/5)

CM Punk defends his World Heavyweight Championship against Jeff Hardy next. This is one of the best feuds of the 00s and really put Punk on the map as a potential top guy. The story here is that Hardy had (finally) gotten his big World Championship victory at the previous show, Extreme Rules, by defeating Edge in a ladder match, but only got to hold the title for a minute because Punk cashed in his briefcase immediately after. Punk didn't turn fully heel, though, as he explained his actions as being fair play and, famously, that "nowhere in the contract does it say I can't cash in on Jeff Hardy." Still, it was clear that Punk was leaning heel and Hardy was the sympathetic figure - two roles that both are so good at playing that the only question was whether they'd have any chemistry in the ring. This match answered that question in the affirmative as Punk tries to keep things grounded and technical and Hardy tried to use his unorthodox offense to hit game-changer moves like the Air Hardy and the Whisper in the Wind. The character interplay in this match effects nearly every sequence as Punk does everything short of outright cheating to try to get the victory, including, at one point, pleading for the ref to pick up his count to disqualify Hardy outside of the ring. There are a bunch of clever finisher escapes and counters and a Dusty Finish when Hardy hits his Swanton, makes the cover, and gets a 3 count...until the referee reverses the decision because Punk's foot is under the bottom rope (which, in my view, it barely was). The match restarts and Punk fakes an injury, hobbling over to the corner to get a breather. As the referee checks on him and holds off Hardy, Punk wallops him with a stiff kick to the back to get himself disqualified...or was it an unintentional strike caused by blindness? Rating a match like this is difficult because the finish, by design, is meant to take the air out of a building. It was almost meant to turn the tide completely against Punk, who actually had his fair share of supporters in Sacramento. It effectively does both, but also means that, after viewing, you're left with the feeling that you've been ripped off. As that is the intention, the match is basically perfect - perfectly disappointing in that way. I'd still consider this, like Jericho/Mysterio, a match bordering between "should watch" and "must watch." (4/5)

Main event time - well, not really. Instead, it's John Cena vs. The Miz in a match that Cena promoted as being a "main event" because he's in it. He wasn't necessarily wrong about that, but whatever...The build for this match was based on The Miz coming out on Raw and challenging Cena for three weeks straight knowing full well that Cena was unable to respond to his challenge and then claiming victory by count-out. It was basically the exact same thing that Jericho did on Nitro in 97' or 98', only, in the end, Cena eventually showed up and this match was set. Many expected this match to be one-sided going into it, but The Miz was in the midst of his first major singles push and actually got some decent offense in. I liked how The Miz targeted Cena's neck as Cena had had surgery on it just about a year prior (a fact that the commentary team doesn't forget to mention either), but that, ultimately, Cena got to assert his dominance regardless as the much more credible worker. Simply put, this match told the exact story it needed to - Cena is The Man, but The Miz is not the scrub that he was 2 years earlier when this match would've been a complete squash. Still, these two would go on to have much better matches and The Miz would continue to develop a much more interesting mix of solid offense and brilliant, crowd-baiting shtick. For what it was, not a terrible match, just not close to either guy's best. (2/5)

And now, the actual main event - Triple H vs. Randy Orton in a 3 Stages of Hell match for Orton's WWE Championship. As I'm not a huge fan of either guy, the very idea of this match made me wonder if it would be me going through hell rather than the wrestlers, but this is actually a rather quick and tame trio of matches. It starts off with a straight-up traditional match and Triple H and Orton spend the minutes with Orton attacking Triple H's injured knee and both guys just trying to hit their finishers rather than actually having the kind of "physical chess game" that they both tend to do (and which tends to bore me to death). Triple H ends up getting himself disqualified, which is consistent with his Game character but still came off as a bit of a heel move and unsurprisingly drew some boos from the audience. Cole noted on commentary that Triple H and Orton had a Last Man Standing match on RAW just a week before this match (this explains Triple H's damaged knee), but also struck me as a perfect encapsulation as to why the WWE's B-level pay-per-views were always a tough sell and felt so unimportant (and still do). I genuinely wonder if the WWE put on actual PPVs today if they'd sell more than AEW's. Anyway, after getting himself disqualified, Triple H is down 0-1 but evens the score rather quickly with a pedigree on the arena floor as the next fall is a Falls Count Anywhere that goes nowhere. The final stage of hell is a Stretcher Match, which seems like a letdown compared to other matches that involved way more weapons and the Hell in a Cell. Stretcher matches are almost never good, or at least they aren't based on the few I've seen, but this one isn't all that bad - it just feels like a midcard match more than a fitting main event or satisfying "feud-ender." When you have to work around a stretcher, you're bound to have good spots and spots that don't work out so well and, like the Matt/Jeff Hardy Stretcher match from April of this same year, creativity can sometimes cost you more than help you if the stretcher itself won't cooperate. In this match, Orton's hangman DDT off the stretcher looks terrific, while bashing your opponent's head on the padded "bed" (and them selling it) is noticeably silly. Orton's Legacy bros eventually show up to prevent Triple H from pushing the stretcher passed the finish line and Orton ends up getting the victory by clocking Triple H with a piece of the floor rather than hitting his RKO, which would've been more definitive. Then, for no real reason, Triple H still reigns supreme at the end of the show by taking out all three guys with sledgehammer shots. This felt like a great opportunity for Triple H to give Orton a semi-clean win, but for whatever reason, we don't get that and the never-ending HHH/Orton rivalry continued on (though, to be fair, Triple H did take a step away from the WWE Title scene as he and MIchaels re-formed DX to take on The Legacy). This wasn't terrible and I probably liked it more than I would've the huge, bloated, overly long match that I was expecting, but it definitely didn't feel anything like the more gruesome and violent 3 Stages of Hell matches that came before it and definitely doesn't touch close to "must see" match territory. (3/5)

With an overall Kwang Score of 2.81-out-of-5, The Bash 2009 might not seem like a show worth seeking out, but there are at least two truly great matches in Mysterio/Jericho and Punk/Hardy on this show and the Tag Titles and Women's Championship aren't too bad either. What drags this show down, even more than the unremarkable Ziggler/Khali match or the underwhelming opener, is the lackluster main event, a 3 Stages of Hell Match that isn't bad but certainly doesn't live up to the standards of previous installments and feels very "PG" by comparison. 

FINAL RATING - Watch It...With Remote in Hand