The show kicked off with one of the more memorable debuts in WWE history - Tazz taking on Kurt Angle. I remember watching this live and actually feeling a bit bad for Tazz. Tazz was able to debut in front of a loud, rabid, hot NYC crowd that recognized him from ECW and was primed for his first appearance. He got to beat Angle clean with his submission in under 5 minutes. His aura was intact. But...Kurt Angle, who had debuted just a few months earlier in November 99', was maybe the single biggest insta-star in WWE history, a guy who, in less than 3 months, was already being talked about as a can't-miss main eventer who was already within the top 3-4 best heels in the company and, in terms of freshness, was at number one. Here, as much as this match is about Tazz, Angle is the guy whose charisma, bumping, selling, and pre- and post-match shenanigans are what you remember. Not a "must see" match, but maybe a "must see" moment for any true WWE or even ECW fan. (3/5)
The Dudley Boys took on The Hardys in a Tables Match next. As expected, this was a wild brawl with some huge bumps from all four men and plenty of chair shots too, some of them as vicious as the ones The Rock hit Foley with a year prior. What makes this match work, though, is the escalation of violence from beginning to end, especially the "near misses" and table teases in the first few moments. The match only goes 10 minutes, but it feels like a real war because there is not a single second wasted. This is also my favorite version of the Dudleys: serious ass-kicker heels before the loaded their matches with too many gimmicky "cheap pop" cues like the "Wazzup" thing. While the TLC matches with Edge and Christian and the Hardys/Edge & Christian match from No Mercy 99' are more often cited as the best matches of this type, this is arguably just as good as any of those and would probably rank fairly high on a list of all-time best tables matches. The feel-good victory for the Hardys coming after another feel-good victory for Tazz feels like the kind of crowd-pleasing booking that Vince inexplicably resists delivering these days. (4/5)
Next up, the Ms. Royal Rumble Bikini Contest. This is a total trainwreck that has not aged well at all, though, to be totally honest, I would note that these sorts of filler segments would become even more gratuitous and tasteless in the years that followed. Also, in terms of crowd responses, this segment kept the already hot crowd sufficiently heated and engaged while also allowing for a break in action, something absolutely needed for a show with such a stacked line-up. Andy Richter is on hand but does not look like he enjoys any of this. Neither does Luna Vachon, who rightfully looks pissed to even be involved. Mae Young eventually shows up for the big ending, flashing the audience (though I'm not sure if she was actually topless or not).
The Intercontinental Championship was on the line next as co-holders Chris Jericho and Chyna defended against Hardcore Holly in a triple threat match. Holly was included in this match because he had defeated both in singles competition in what I'm guessing were non-title matches, but this is really about the Jericho/Chyna one-upsmanship. The live crowd is 100% behind Jericho and boo everything Chyna does to cut him off. There's been quite a bit written about this stretch of Jericho's first WWE run as he had come in, got heat with "the boys" and famously Triple H despite being super over, and was reportedly paired with Chyna as a way to cool him down and "put him in his place." Of course, Chyna was, if not necessarily as popular as she once was and certainly not a great in-ring performer, still one of the most recognizable figures in the company so all this did was give Jericho a semi-prominent TV role that he proceeded to use to get even more over. At the same time, the pairing actually exposed Chyna a bit, her own charisma looking lesser compared to Jericho, arguably at his peak in terms of blending babyface clowning with fast-paced, hard-hitting wrestling. This match doesn't go a full 10 minutes and feels like a TV bout but, again, it ends in a satisfying note with Jericho getting the clean W. Above-average due to the hot crowd and some good sequences, with Holly looking better than I remembered him. (3/5)
The WWE Tag Team Champions, The New Age Outlaws, defend against The Acolytes next. This one doesn't even go 3 minutes, which is either because the Miss Royal Rumble pageant went too long or because Vince was nervous about killing the crowd with a match that was essentially heel/heel (though the Outlaws and their shtick was still quite popular with live crowds despite them being part of the McMahon-Helmsley Regime). Despite its brevity, the Acolytes get to show off their powerhouse moves and it actually seems like they might walk away with the titles before the Outlaws cheat their way to retaining. (1.5/5)
The WWE Championship is on the line next as Cactus Jack challenges Triple H in a no DQ streetfight. While Triple H had had some big matches before him (against The Rock at SummerSlam 98', against Mankind throughout 97') and had worked with some of the best in the company (Austin and Owen Hart throughout 98'), he was still relatively unproven as the top heel in the company despite winning his first WWE Championship in the summer of 99'. In that stretch, Triple H had had forgettable match after forgettable match and, while the angles and storylines were hot, there was an unmistakable sense that Triple H was still a tier down from being a true top guy. Anyway, Cactus Jack dominates early, overwhelming Triple H with strikes until they go to the floor and things start evening up. Triple H levels Foley with a chairshot, but Mick won't stay down and they end up back on the floor with Hunter getting back body dropped over the barricade. They go into the crowd and make their way over to the entrance, Cactus now using a trash can on the champion. They go back into the ring and we get the introduction of the barbed wire 2x4 which gets booted away by the ref only to be brought back into the action minutes later by Cactus Jack, who uses it to lacerate Triple H's head. I'm not sure if this was the first WWE match to feature barbed wire but I wouldn't be surprised to learn that it was. Like the table spots in the Dudleys/Hardys match, its hard to watch this match and not be a touch underwhelmed only because matches like this became "the norm" in the years that followed, but listen to the crowd reaction and check the pacing of this match and you'll see why this one holds up and could never really be replicated. They end up back on the floor and we get a table spot and then even more brawling leading to a classic Foley bump into the steel stairs. Triple H then grabs a pair of handcuffs, a callback to the Mankind/Rock match from the previous year's Rumble. This time, though, it is noticeable that Foley has protected himself a bit by not getting cuffed behind his back and the cuffs are "looser," allowing him to actually protect himself and fight back. Triple H grabs a chair and literally breaks it over Foley's back in another cool visual. Foley looks to be in real trouble until The Rock comes out in a questionable booking decision. The Rock hits Triple H with a chair to help out his buddy, though I wish they would've come up with a more clever way to reverse the tide than a run-in. Foley, freed from his cuffs, now looks to have the advantage and hits Triple H with a piledriver on the announce table (though it doesn't break, which always makes it seem a bit worse actually). Mick dumps Triple H back into the ring and brings out a back of thumbtacks (again, I'm not 100% sure this is the first WWE match to feature thumbtacks, but I'd wager it was). Foley wants to drop Triple H into the tacks, but Triple H ends up back body dropping him onto them instead! Triple H then hits a pedigree, but somehow Cactus Jack kicks out! This draws a massive reaction from the New York crowd. Triple H then delivers a pedigree onto the tacks, a finish that was absolutely insane for a major wrestling company to do in 2000 even if the deathmatch style had been around for decades. If Rock/Mankind is hard to watch because of the excessive chair shots, this one is much funner to watch as the brutality is more balanced and the work is undeniably safer (a thumbtack in your back is obviously painful, but a concussion can have serious long-term ramifications). This is an interesting match to consider if one were to make a top 100 list of WWE matches ever. I'm not sure it would rank in the Top 10 or the Top 20, but somewhere around #50 sounds about right even if that seems low considering how influential this match was and, if one could transport back to 2000, how mind-blowing this match was for its time. Also, unlike the aforementioned Rock/Mankind match from 1999 or Foley's infamous Hell in a Cell match against Undertaker, this was an actual match and not a stunt show (though I'd put his match against Shawn Michaels from Mind Games ahead of it). But it doesn't really matter where this one "ranks" or whether it is a masterpiece or just a near-masterpiece, it is absolutely must-see and a very entertaining 30 minutes of wrestling. (4.5/5)
Main event time - the 2000 edition of the Royal Rumble match. In a bit of a letdown, our opening two are D'Lo Brown and "Grandmaster Sexxay" Brian Christopher, not exactly main event level talent. Still, because this was the WWE in 2000, the crowd doesn't shit on them or on the number 3 entrant: Headbanger Mosh. The first big entrant is Rikishi at #5, but this is still months away from the heel turn and "I did it for The Rock" promo that was supposed to launch him into singles success (and didn't). The ring starts filling up with even more guys that stand no chance of winning - Boss Man, Test, British Bulldog, Bob Backlund (a nice bone to throw to the old school NYC fans) and a young Edge. Chris Jericho comes in at #15 to the largest pop yet but, as he was Intercontinental Champion, I doubt anyone believed he could win this. Chyna comes in not too long after, marking the second time she appeared in a Rumble (I think? Or maybe the 3rd time?). Regardless, this match is really all about The Rock anyway as Austin was injured and the Undertaker was also nursing injuries that kept him working in mostly tags in December 99' and then out entirely from January into the late spring of 2000. With those two stars out and Triple H having no real rivals aside from The Rock (and Foley), it was fairly obvious who would be getting the W. The Rock comes in at #24 to work the home stretch and gets the biggest pop of the match (as would be expected). Big Show comes in at #26 and Kane at #28, both of whom were kayfabe favorites but were certainly not viewed as realistic options to headline WrestleMania (Big Show's first couple years in WWE were an undeniable letdown fraught with odd booking decisions, an awkward pairing with the Undertaker, weight/mobility issues, and an emphasis on comedy that all but killed as credibility as a serious monster). Eventually, it comes down to The Rock and Big Show after some shenanigans involving DX and Kane. Big Show looks like he may have the match won but The Rock manages to hold onto the ropes and Big Show goes tumbling over the top. As I wrote earlier, this was another damaging loss to Big Show as he was once again presented as an underachieving oaf who couldn't win "the big one." The crowd goes home happy, though, as The Rock was headed to WrestleMania to challenge Triple H. Of course, because these two had already wrestled countless times and Foley was still super popular and Vince was still hoping to get more out of his investment in Big Show, a simple HHH/Rock main event at Mania was not what we ended up getting...but that's a story for a different review. (2.5/5)
With a Kwang Score of 3.08-out-of-5, the 2000 Royal Rumble might be overrated by some, but for its day, it was widely considered to be one of the best top-to-bottom WWE pay-per-views of not just the Attitude Era but any era. The WWE Championship match is a deservedly hailed as a career match for Triple H and one of Foley's best too, while the Dudleys/Hardys bout is a slept-on gem. The Tazz/Angle opener is arguably "must see" based on the atmosphere and buzz alone, still palpable on rewatch. The main event is not one of the better Rumbles ever, but its far from one of the worst despite a noticeable lack of star power or big surprises.
FINAL RATING - Watch It...With Remote in Hand
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