After Lillian Garcia sings the National Anthem, we kick off the show with D'Lo Brown and The Godfather taking on Bull Buchanan and The Bossman. The babyface entrance is cut out of the Peacock version of this show, most likely due to licensing issues because I believe Ice T performed a song during their entrance. This was surprisingly not too too bad. Bossman was nowhere near as good as he once was, but its hard to pinpoint exactly what wasn't working aside from just being a stale character who was less dynamic than he was at his peak. Buchanan was more impressive than I remember him but this still isn't very good. (2/5)
Next up - the Hardcore Battle Royal for Crash Holly's Hardcore Championship. Man, thinking about Tazz's run in WWE is a great way to exercise one's brain. Tazz debuted for the WWE at the Rumble and had a somewhat infamous match against the then-undefeated Kurt Angle, one in which Tazz supposedly drew criticism from the higher-ups for working too reckless of a style. From there, at No Way Out, the Human Suplex Machine feuded with Bossman, getting beaten down by him and Prince Albert on the show but showing his toughness by refusing to stay down. A month later and Bossman and Albert were no longer even a team so that just goes to show how much long-term planning they put into that whole storyline. In fact, I'm not sure Tazz even got revenge for the attack on TV. Anyway, this match is fought under the rules where the last person to pin the champion leaves with the belt after 15 minutes. Tazz wins the title early on and it seems like a perfect opportunity to show his toughness by having him outlast every other competitor for the remainder of the match. I can understand why they didn't go that route - it would've been hard to stretch a match like this for 15 minutes without multiple pinfalls and it does make things much more exciting - but it didn't necessarily do any favors for Tazz, a guy who came into the company with a high level of hype but was also undeniably undersized and needed to be booked extra strong to work as a badass character in the "Land of the Giants." So Tazz wins the title, but loses it within a few minutes to Viscera, who then loses it to someone else, who then loses it to someone else and so on. At one point, Joey Abs gets busted open and it is super duper gory. He either bladed himself (horribly) or was dumb enough to have someone else cut him. Other highlights (or lowlights depending on your taste) include Bradshaw absolutely waffling people with a cooking sheet and a really nifty finishing sequence that allowed Hardcore to win the title as the clock wound down. This was never going to be a 5-star classic and I think this would've been better if it had been whittled down to just 10 minutes, but its not awful. (2/5)
"Headcheese" (aka Al Snow and Steve Blackman) take on the team of T&A (Test and Albert) in the next match. Al Snow's "comedy" is groan-inducing. This was hard to enjoy, though its not like WrestleMania has historically been a card loaded with only the best and most exciting matches. Look back at WrestleMania III or V or XI and you're going to find lots of bad wrestling. This is that. Test and Albert have some cool combo moves but both of them have the personality of oatmeal. Having disgusting body hair is not a gimmick (or at least not a good one). Its not fun seeing Trish Stratus during this part of her career as she was only being used as "eye candy" and, though I'm sure she was happy to just be featured at the time (having only been in the company for a few months by this point, if I'm not mistaken), it still doesn't mean her segments or storylines from back then have aged particularly well or were even remotely interesting. If the first two matches were passable because they at least had the crowd's interest, this one was clearly a "piss break" for many fans as you could hear a mouse cut wind. A point for effort. (1/5)
Next up - Christian & Edge vs. The Dudley Boys vs. The Hardys for the Dudley's WWE World Tag Team Championships in a ladder match. It shocks me that this only received 4 stars from the Observer as this is arguably among the top 10 most influential matches in the history of the WWE. While it may not rank up as high as the TLC matches these two teams would eventually do battle in, this was the blueprint for an entire genre of multi-man ladder matches, including the eventual Money in the Bank variety, in the WWE. The "original" Michaels/Ramon Ladder match from WrestleMania X is rightfully considered groundbreaking and incredibly influential and this match is almost nearly as important because of the amount of high-risk maneuvers on display. This is a fireworks show of a match, but I'm not sure I'd consider it just a pure "spotfest." The way this match unfolds, there may not be a ton of prolonged selling and its possible that my view has been tainted by seeing so many pale imitations of this match over the years, but it didn't strike me as just a shallow "spotfest." There is an escalation of violence. There is something of an internal logic to it despite several times when guys are adjusting ladders or setting up tables when they should be trying to grab the titles. Highlights include Edge spearing someone off a ladder, Jeff Hardy's Swanton in the entranceway from a ladder through a table, and Bubba throwing a ladder directly into Hardy's face as he comes off the barricade. This match holds up despite how many times we've seen these spots since because the characters and the motivations and the chemistry are all there. For what it is and what it inspired, I don't know how you can't consider this a perfect match. (5/5)
This match was followed by Terri vs. The Kat in a "Cat Fight" where you won by throwing your opponent over the top rope. I'm not sure why they went with that stipulation aside from maybe thinking that these two were so unathletic and so unable of anything that could even resemble a wrestling match that they didn't want to risk them botching a simple pinfall. Val Venis is the guest referee and is sporting a tee-shirt where the font is meant to look like semen. Its disgusting. His pre-match promo is also X-rated. This is all so gross. Mae Young and Moolah are involved too. Hard to watch but at least it doesn't last longer than a few minutes? Pretty putrid. (0.5/5)
Chyna and Too Cool vs. The Radicalz (Eddie Guerrero, Dean Malenko, and Perry Saturn) is next. This was fun but nothing super substantial and was clearly designed with showcasing the Guerrero/Chyna storyline more than anything. Eddie "steals" the match with his character work and energy, though this isn't all shtick and there is some actual wrestling on display at times with lots of tags in order to get everyone their moment to shine. (2.5/5)
Both of Kurt Angle's Championships - the European and Intercontinental - are up for grabs in a triple threat against Chris Jericho and Kurt Angle. This match was clearly designed to be the "workrate" match of show and, in terms of energy and high impact offense and pace, it absolutely is. Unfortunately, the structure of the match and the crowd's apparent disinterest in actual wrestling prevented this from really clicking. The crowd's indifference towards this style of match was not uncommon for the WWE at the time, which had gone so far into the entertainment half of 'sports-entertainment' that most undercard and TV matches rarely went past the 5 minute mark. The WWE audience of the time was simply more interested in acts like The Godfather and his hos than they were in the technique of Chris Benoit or how Chris Jericho blended a lucha and Japanese-inspired offense. It's a shame too because had the crowd reacted to more of this, it might've come across as more suspenseful. But the crowd isn't the only problem in the match either. The structure - two falls, the first for the Intercontinental Title and the second for the European - was awkward and its no surprise that few companies have resurrected this particular stipulation. The first pinfall got a decent pop, but there was a lull afterwards, a response that one could've predicted because of how the "natural" end of the match was made instantly mute as we went into an "unnatural" second round. Maybe they should've had Jericho win the first to get the crowd excited rather than giving the W to Benoit, the least over (at this time) guy in the match? I'd still consider this above-average just because of how good all three guys are, but this was not the homerun that the guys were clearly working very hard to achieve. (3/5)
Kane and Rikishi took on X-Pac and The Road Dogg next. This was all about Tori - Kane's ex-girlfriend - getting her comeuppance and the crowd is more into this than they were for the previous bout, which just goes to show how little they actually cared about wrestling and how much more this audience was into the stories and characters. Me, personally, I wasn't a fan of any of this. After the match, there's some nonsense with the San Diego Chicken and Pete Rose and Too Cool and Rikishi do their dance because of course they do. This was fine for what it was, I guess? (2/5)
Main event time - Triple H defending his WWE Championship against The Rock, The Big Show, and Mick Foley in a Fatal Fourway (elimination style) with "A McMahon in Every Corner." I'm not 100% sure what the original plan was for WrestleMania 2000 before Steve Austin's neck injury put him on the sidelines in November 1999 (and led to the infamous "Who Ran Over Stone Cold?" angle that ended with it being revealed that Rikishi did it "for The Rock"), though a bit of internet sleuthing reveals that there was some discussion of Austin winning the title at Survivor Series or the Rumble and then defending it against The Big Show or even Austin turning heel sometime during the build to Mania and facing The Rock. I'm not sure I buy either story. Austin and The Rock were both still super popular in 99' and, as we'd learn in 2001, Austin's ability to stay heel and get heel reactions was often an uphill climb against an audience that continued to find him so entertaining. While I've read that the Big Show was "guaranteed" a WrestleMania main event, I'm not sure if there's any real truth to that. Anyway...this is a "rough night at the office" for everyone involved as there are clearly a few unintended moments/"botches" that keep this one from being great. The match begins with The Rock, Foley, and Triple H all eventually working on Big Show, which is a good way to build him up as a huge threat in the match. Unfortunately, having him go out clean within the first 10 minutes eviscerates that credibility instantly and Big Show's unceremonious exit should probably be referred to more when people talk about his early WWE years as an extended "flop." With Big Show gone, the match becomes a Triple Threat and its not a bad one. I liked the various ways the three men went at eachother, forging and breaking mid-match alliances. Plus, Foley was still bumping like a madman at times. These three guys had a ton of shared history to draw from and while we do get some nods to it, they don't explore enough of it for me. I would've liked to see some throwbacks to The Rock and Foley's hellacious "I Quit" match from the previous year's Rumble, for example. Plus, despite their best efforts (and some clear attempts at blading), nobody gets the "color" they should've and, when Foley launches himself off the second rope onto the Spanish Announce Table, he misses hard and Triple H has to salvage the spot with two unremarkable elbow drops in an effort to put Rocky through it. Clearly this was supposed to be one of the big spots in the match, but its only memorable for not working. The same can be said for the use of the barbwire 2x4, a weapon that should all-but-guarantee some bloodshed but produces none on anyone. Foley goes down next after a pair of pedigrees - the second one not looking all that great - but attacks Triple H with the 2x4 before he leaves. Triple H and The Rock go on to have a match that is arguably better than most probably remember it. I really liked Triple H's use of a chair-and-stairs combo at one point. I thought there were some good false finishes. Unfortunately, they practically pause the match for 4-5 minutes so that Vince and Shane can brawl at ringside and, again, one gets the impression from commentary that the plan was for Vince to bleed a gusher but he only really gets a trickle (with JR hilariously overselling the blood loss on commentary). The match ends with the eventual and very predictable Vince heel turn on The Rock as Triple H becomes the first - if I'm not mistaken - heel to leave WrestleMania with the WWE Championship. During the post-match, The Rock gets his revenge on The McMahons to send the crowd home happy, though I doubt many were even talking about this match as they left the arena with much fonder memories of the Ladder Match hours earlier. (3/5)
With a Kwang Score of 2.33-out-of-5, WrestleMania 2000 is a show weakened by an uneven card that features only one "must see" match and at least three matches that suffered from overbooking and overcrowding. The Kane/X-Pac feud, which had been going on for months by this point, didn't gain anything from Rikishi and Road Dogg's involvement. The US/IC Triple Threat match was designed to be the night's big "workrate" match, but the concept didn't work. The main event was sloppy at times and when some of the big moments and spots they planned go awry, the match never really recovers. Vince betraying The Rock wasn't fresh or exciting, a base hit that the commentary teams tries to sell as a game-winning grand slam.
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