The 2024 Royal Rumble kicked off with the first of two Rumble matches: the Women's Royal Rumble. Having the match start with Nattie Neidhart in light of the accusations made against Vince McMahon earlier in the weekend seemed almost like a rib as Nattie's love and support for the company is practically part of her gimmick. Naomi (Trinity Fatu) made her return to the company and got a huge reaction from the crowd. Naomi wasn't the only big debut/return as TNA Knockout Champion Jordynne Grace also showed up. I really like the inclusion of outside talent as it helps put over the idea that talent from all over the world want to "punch their ticket" to the main event of WrestleMania. The biggest debut, though, came towards the end of the night as Jade Cargill made her first in-ring appearance for the company and nearly won. Becky, Nia, Asuka, Kairi Sane...they all got spotlighted in various ways, but as a whole, this match felt slow and boring at times, the ring feeling too crowded at certain points. Any match with 30 participants is bound to include some "filler" talent like Katana Chance and Michin, but what's make things worse is how interchangeable and indistinguishable so many of the talents were. How many Harley Quinn-esque talents does the roster need? How many women with outlandish hair coloring? The NXT talent who competed in the match didn't wow me with especially exciting gimmicks or styles either. I liked seeing Bayley get the deserved win and expect she will be challeging IYO Sky at Mania, but the biggest story coming out of this match is what the near future holds for Cargill. This wasn't bad, but (2.5/5)
Roman Reigns defended his WWE Championship in a Fatal Fourway against LA Knight, Randy Orton, and AJ Styles in the next bout. Lots of good action in a match that began with a pace much faster than most of Reigns' title defenses over the past 3+ years. Unfortunately, once Reigns took over, things slowed down so he could do his shtick. LA Knight was very over with the crowd, but they popped for plenty of Orton's offense too. A match like this isn't about the finish - there was never any question about who was leaving with the Championship - and so its really all about the sequences and layout and whether an interesting story is told. It worked for me. Knight shined more than in any other major match I've seen, Orton got to have his moments (including a wonderful false finish after hitting the RKO on every other competitor only to get denied by Solo Sikoa), and AJ was his usual Phenomenal self. I liked AJ busting out a chair late in the match as a heel tactic and thought the finishing sequence was fantastic, even if it was a little bit hard to follow just because of how quickly all the moving parts came together. Not a "must see" match, but certainly an above-average, solid defense for Reigns. (3/5)
Next up - Kevin Owens vs. Logan Paul for Paul's United States Championship. Owens controlled early, tossing Paul around the outside of the ring before unleashing an awesome release suplex in the middle of the ring. Logan Paul's batting average is just incredible at this point, even if he has had the benefit of working with only the most experienced and talented members of the roster. Owens was a fantastic foil for Logan Paul, the gruff and tough everyman juxtaposed against the cocky "pretty boy" egomaniac. I liked that Paul targeted Owens' hands (and how good Owens' selling was throughout the match) and how much mid-match gloating Logan did to make sure the audience never lost interest. Owens' offense looked terrific, everything he did having an extra snap to it on this night. This was a physical match with lots of crash landings and big suplexes and a good, storyline-furthering finish that protected Owens even in a DQ loss. Not "must see," but very good. (3.5/5)
The Men's Royal Rumble match headlined the show as "Main Event" Jey Uso came out at number one and, in a not-so-big-of-a-shocker, his brother Jimmy came out at number 2. The Usos got a moment together, but I must admit, I didn't really get the "goosebumps" that others did and am not really interested in seeing them square off in a full feud yet. Grayson Waller came out at #3, mic in hand, and teamed up with Jimmy to work over Jey. The first big surprise of the match happened at the #4 spot as Andrade made his return to the WWE after a so-so run in AEW. Carmelo Hayes made his WWE PLE debut at #5 and, as I don't watch SmackDown regularly or NXT, this was my first glimpse at the former NXT Champion. Kinda like Andrade, I was excited to see him at first, but then wasn't all that impressed as everyone just kinda folded into a growing ball of unremarkableness. Nakamura and Santos Escobar were next out, the former getting a much bigger reaction than the latter. Escobar and Andrade had a fun segment together before Karrion Kross made his way to the ring. Dominik Mysterio came out at #9 and got massive boos. He is easily among the top 3-4 biggest heels in the industry. Carlito came out at #10 and like Kross and Dom before him, nothing super exciting happened unless you count watching him bite an apple. Like the women's match, there were too many lazy elimination attempts and not enough actual eliminations as the ring filled up with guys that had no chance of winning. Bobby Lashley entered at #11 and out went Carlito and Karrion Kross, but then it was Lashley who got screwed by Kross from the outside. This led to a brawl involving the Street Profits and the Authors of Pain. Fine storytelling there, but I'm not going out of my way to see where this goes on SmackDown because Kross is so dull. Ludwig Kaiser came in at #11 and went right after Carmelo Hayes but then just mostly strutted around. Kaiser has become one of my favorites and I can't wait to see what he'll do once he's out of GUNTHER's shadow. He had no story here either. Austin Theory was next in and after hitting a cool move on Hayes, went right to doing nothing. I don't expect a ton of brilliant psychology in a Royal Rumble match, but this match really lacked suspense and was straight-up boring at times. After Balor came in at #14, Cody Rhodes made his entrance, receiving an absolutely massive reaction from the St. Pete crowd. With Rhodes in, things did pick up a bit, reminding me of the years when the Rumble wouldn't really get going until Hogan showed up. Bronson Reed got a small bit of the spotlight as the next entrant before Kofi Kingston joined the fray. This was Kingston's 16th Rumble, which is wild. Kaiser, Andrade, and Nakamura were all eliminated around this time, the match thinning out a little before GUNTHER made his way to the ring. GUNTHER went on a "chopping spree" before eliminating Kofi with relative ease. Kofi not doing one of his big gimmicky near-eliminations was a bit of a bummer as the match needed some fun beyond just seeing Jimmy Uso fail to make any friends. Ivar and Reed had a cool exchange right before Bron Breaker made his way down the aisle. Breaker eliminated Jimmy Uso with a clothesline and then tossed Balor before having a staredown with GUNTHER. Good moment there and maybe a tease for a Mania match? Omos came in at #21, accompanied by MVP. Omos eliminated Reed (or Reed eliminated himself mostly in an awkward clothesline spot). Ivar tried to come off the ropes, but got speared by Bron in another neat moment involving the Son of a Steiner. Pat McAfee came in next, which didn't make a ton of sense as he acted shocked and then scared to participate. McAfee would've had to enter the Rumble, right? And known what number he drew, right? Unfunny. Illogical. Stupid. After a little bit of comedy, Breaker dumped Omos only to get tossed by Dom Mysterio. Outside the ring, Breaker hit JD McDonough with a nasty spear on the floor. Great showing from Breaker in an otherwise unremarkable Rumble. R-Truth came in at #24 and rolled JD into the ring only for McDonough to get eliminated instantly. R-Truth did some silly shtick involving wanting Dom to tag him in before paying homage to John Cena, drawing one of the biggest pops of the match. The Miz came in at #25 and went right after GUNTHER, who he feuded with not too long before this. I liked the interplay between Truth, Miz, and Dom too as Miz and Truth have lots of history together. Damien Priest came in at #26 and went right after Truth, eliminating his would-be stablemate. Priest dominated for the next few minutes but didn't get any more eliminations before CM Punk came out at #27. Punk came in with a big flurry of offense and then eliminated Dom before fading into the background. Ricochet was out at #28 and got a pretty muted response. The Miz got eliminated from a chest chop as he sat on the top rope. Drew McIntyre came in at #29, a guy that has been doing some great heel work on Raw as of late. Jey Uso got eliminated by GUNTHER and then it was time for #30: Sami Zayn. Zayn went right after McIntyre, the guy who had put him on the shelf. McIntyre eliminated Ricochet soon after, flipping him out of the ring by his foot. The final six had a bit of a staredown, but this match seemed flat. McIntyre connected with a Future Shock DDT onto Punk but ate an Exploder and then a Helluva Kick. Zayn eliminated Priest but then got dumped himself, the final four now being Rhodes, Punk, GUNTHER, and McIntyre. Great final minutes here as GUNTHER and McIntyre brutalized the babyfaces. McIntyre looked like he might've had the match won but got eliminated by CM Punk. Meanwhile, in a scenario not dissimilar to the end of last year's match, Cody Rhodes eliminated GUNTHER and we were down to two. Also like last year, the final two took their time working towards the end, trading finishers, selling the exhaustion, really building towards a finale that saw Punk escape a GTS to toss Punk onto the floor. This wasn't as good as last year's Rumble and needed more "fun" elements and maybe even one or two more surprise entrants. (2/5)
Overall, not a great Rumble event, but it manages to squeak by with one of the higher Kwang Ratings of the past few years (a 2.75-out-of-5) because of its brevity and straight-to-the-point execution. Every match felt important and purposeful even if I wouldn't necessarily call anything "must see." The concept of the Rumble sells itself to die-hards and casual fans, but this one would only truly entertain those that are familiar with the current storylines and the full roster, including NXT. If you're not one of those fans, this show would definitely drag.
FINAL RATING - High Risk Maneuver
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