RATING LEVELS:
Curt Hennig – A “GOAT” show, as Perfect as possible
Watch It – A consistently good show worth watching in its entirety
Watch It…With Remote in Hand – 3 or more above-average ratings
High Risk Maneuver – Mostly filler, inessential, but 1-2 good matches
DUDleyville – Zero redeeming qualities, chore to watch
WCW/nWo Souled Out - January 1997
Cedar Rapids, Iowa
COMMENTARY: Eric Bischoff and Ted DiBiase
The notorious WCW/nWo Souled Out PPV kicks off with members of the New World Order cruising down Cedar Rapids on the back of garbage trucks with a police escort blaring their sirens. When they reach the arena, the stage is unlike any other PPV's design I've ever seen, three huge video walls and a podium from which the nWo's top administrator, Eric Bischoff, welcomes the audience. The wrestling equivalent of a Nuremberg rally might be the only way to describe it. Absolutely incredible, innovative, and unique. Bonus point for creativity! (+1)
The wrestling portion of the show starts with Masahiro Chono taking on "Lionheart" Chris Jericho. DiBiase and Bischoff have little to no chemistry, though, admittedly, they are in somewhat unchartered territory by having to provide play-by-play via their antagonistic, sarcastic heel gimmicks. In the ring, Jericho brings a ton of energy and Chono is serviceable, the match featuring at least a handful of bright moments (including a respectable table spot). Nick Patrick's purposely poor ref'ing is a touch less annoying and obvious than what he did at Chono's last match at Clash of the Champions XXXIV which allows for there to actually be some suspense when Jericho gets the upperhand. A touch above average. (3/5)
Bischoff and DiBiase gab about the motorcycles on display and the contestants in tonight's Miss nWo contest. They toss things over to Jeff Katz, who I guess was the operator of the nWo hotline (?), standing by one of tonight's contestants. Katz looks about as uncool as any person could possibly look in sunglasses and a leather jacket. His first interviewees offer absolutely nothing interesting on the mic, seemingly caught off guard that they'd actually have to answer questions rather than just sit on motorcycles and smile.
Decked out in tie-dye and accompanied by Jimmy Hart, Hugh Morrus makes his way down the ring for a Texas Death match against the nWo's resident hoss, Big Bubba. Morrus is constantly praised for his agility as a big man, but he's upstaged by the former Bossman, whose bumping and character work here is remarkable, drawing good heat through the use of low blows, weapon use, and cheap shots. Morrus is comparatively less engaging, surprisingly infusing his work with none of the charisma he seemed to do almost effortlessly in his TV matches. Obviously, this is a more "serious" match and Morrus is trying to bring that tone to it, but by not incorporating any of his trademark laughs or smiles, he undercuts his own gimmick. When the match spills out of the ring, the use of a motorcycle as a weapon is novel, but more comical than anything. Somewhat enjoyable match that manages to squeak by through the strong character work of Bubba and the ridiculousness of the final spot. (2.5/5)
And we're back with Jeff Katz, interviewing more of tonight's Miss nWo contestants, followed by more filler material, including a tour of the nWo website.
Jeff Jarrett vs. VK Wallstreet is next, a match that screams...something, but definitely not "PPV worthy." Jarrett controls early on, outmaneuvering his veteran opponent and connecting with a big crossbody from the top. Jarrett is an interesting character at this point - booked as a babyface but not necessarily a likeable one, especially considering his connection to Debra McMichael, the Horsemen's least beloved valet and real-life better half of Steve "Mongo" McMichael. There are a few too many pregnant pauses in this one for me, Wallstreet locking in a headlock that fans are indifferent to no matter how much Jarrett tries to pull them in. Jarrett's figure four gets a decent reaction, as does Mongo's eventual involvement. Arn Anderson's unimpressed view from the stands sums things up. (2/5)
"The Babe Hunter" Jeff Katz welcomes us to the "Senior Division" of the Miss nWo contest, interviewing a pair of older women, one of whom seems to have trouble hearing Jeff's questions. I'm not sure if this is the absolute worst on-going segment in the history of a wrestling pay-per-view or just the third or fourth worst.
Here we go with the first actual built-up match of the night - Scotty Riggs stepping into nWo territory to take on his former tag team partner, Marcus "Buff" Bagwell. Riggs' attitude as he walks into the ring is absolutely the wrong one - I mean, I "get" that the American Males were meant to be cocky, somewhat self-centered chippendales, but Riggs should be coming into this match as a pissed off, sympathetic babyface ready to exact revenge on the man who turned on him, not a self-absorbed pretty boy. From that misstep we get yet another as Riggs allows Buff several minutes to take off his coat and show off his guns instead of going right after him, which is how a grudge match should start. When the action begins, the back and forth isn't terrible, but its not riveting either. Riggs takes a nice bump into the barricade at one point, but Bagwell follows it up by posing instead of getting even more brutal in his attack on his former friend. Bagwell eventually goes there by hitting Riggs with a wicked powerbomb and cutting off his comebacks with some stomps and punches to the head. But despite Bagwell's dominance, the crowd never gets behind Riggs, keeping his eventual run on offense from garnering any sort of reaction. They worked hard and seemed to execute the gameplan they had going into things correctly, but there were too many flaws in the psychology of the match itself (which goes at least a minute or two longer than necessary) for this to work. (1.5/5)
More Jeff Katz and, again, his interviewee can't quite hear his questions despite him practically screaming in her ear. At first I found these segments to be sorta funny, but after three or four of em', I'm more annoyed than anything.
The WCW Tag Team Championships are on the line next - The Outsiders defending the straps against The Steiner Brothers. The crowd is red hot for this, but the action just isn't great. Scott Hall takes some impressive bumps from the Steiners' suplex-based offense, but this is too standard a match to achieve much beyond just being average. It doesn't help that Bischoff and DiBiase completely bury the finish on commentary, guaranteeing that it doesn't matter and that it will be overturned the following night. Decent and I'll at least give credit to the competitors' respectable efforts, but this one just didn't come together. (2.5/5)
Syxx competes for the United States Championship he stole from reigning champion Eddie Guerrero in a ladder match next. Unlike the previous bout, the crowd is fairly dead for this until the ladder gets introduced, which is a shame because both Guerrero and Syxx showcase a ton of excellent aerial moves in the early going. When the ladder comes into play, the crowd perks up, but I'd argue that the in-ring action actually levels off a bit as Guerrero and Syxx perform a number of spots that had been done better elsewhere without adding much originality. I also didn't particularly like the clumsy finish, one that almost seems "too obvious" for a ladder match but could've worked if it was better executed. While certainly the match of the night (by a wide margin), I wouldn't go digging for this one (and this is coming from a fairly big and admittedly bias Guerrero mark). Dave Meltzer gave this one 4-stars in the Observer, but I wonder what he'd give it on re-watch. (3.5/5)
And, with roughly 30 minutes left on the show, we're set for the incredibly awkward and grating finale of the Miss nWo contest. I almost wanted to give this 5-stars for how bizarre it is, but I deducted a half-point for every minute it overstayed its welcome. There are actual moments where women whisper inaudibly into Bischoff's ear, making sure the audience can participate in exactly zero percent of whatever "fun" this is supposed to be. The sight of Bischoff swapping spit with the winner is one of the more grotesque moments in not just WCW history but maybe world history. When the winner parades around the ring following her coronation, the look on the faces of the audience says it all - this was not just stupid, it was boring. Awful, unwatchable, not even "so bad it's good." (0/5)
Main event time - The Giant challenging Hollywood Hogan for the WCW World Heavyweight Championship. Hogan arrives backed up by a whole crew of Dallas Cowboys (and, for whatever reason, Vincent) while Bischoff describes how countless promoters, including Verne Gagne, Jerry Jarrett, and Vince McMahon, have all ridden on the Hulkster's coattails to amass their fortunes. His entrance, like the kickoff to the show, is a pretty awesome sight and another example of how innovative and cool the production around this show was. Almost instantly, though, garbage begins to be pelted towards the ring, symbolic of the "action" that is delivered. Giant starts by hitting Hogan with a series of chest chops, causing Hogan to duck out of the ring, before he sneaks back in and clips the big man at his knees. Hogan proceeds to bash his head into the ring, follows it up with a series of boots to the midsection, and then pulls out some chops of his own. If this sounds like high-impact offense to you, you'll love this match...but if you're looking for something resembling a contest of athleticism, agility, strength, and submissions, steer clear. What might be most remarkable about this match is that these two had a ton of matches prior to this, which would suggest that they could've relied on a few signature spots and momentum shifts to carry them through a passable contest (the way, say, Giant and Luger did in their underrated Starrcade match a month prior). Instead, this one doesn't bother to tell any sort of dramatic story - instead, there's powder-throwing, choking with a rope, and, for some bizarre reason, The Giant attempting to come off the top rope because they must've figured the match needed an interesting moment but didn't want to come up with something logical. Moments later, Hogan drops the Giant with a bodyslam and connects with a legdrop, but ends up on the receiving end of a chokeslam when he wastes time gloating (and The Giant no sells what was once the most devastating finisher in the sport). This leads to a thoroughly disappointing screwjob finish that spits in the face of the audience (who, as expected, begin to fill the ring with more trash). If this were the end of a Nitro, it might be reasonable - but WCW expected people to pay for this (and it was considerably more than $9.99). The only saving grace is the near deafening "We Want Sting" chant that breaks out, a cool moment that is, unfortunately, not capitalized on by actually having the Stinger make an appearance. (1/5)
With an average match/segment rating of 2.13-out-of-5, Souled Out is a very difficult show to watch. While the production is unique, the novelty of the show wears thin as Bischoff and DiBiase's commentary gets more irritating, Nick Patrick's cheating gets tiresome, and the Miss nWo segments go from somewhat funny to increasingly annoying. There's also not a single match on the card that is really worth watching, not even the overrated Guerrero/Syxx ladder match. Had this been a Clash of the Champions, it could have been passable, but considering this was an actual pay-per-view, I can't imagine that the fans who purchased this event felt like they got their money's worth. I definitely want my three hours back.
FINAL RATING - DUDleyville
No comments:
Post a Comment