WWE WrestleMania 32 - April 2016
Dallas, Texas
CHAMPIONSHIP RUNDOWN: Coming into tonight's show, Triple H is the WWE World Champion, Kevin Owens is the Intercontinental Champion, Kalisto is the United States Champion, the WWE Tag Team Champions are the New Day, and Charlotte holds the WWE Divas Championship.
COMMENTARY: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, JBL
WrestleMania 32 kicked off proper with the 7-man Intercontinental Ladder Match featuring Kevin Owens, Sami Zayn, The Miz, Zack Ryder, Sin Cara, and Stardust. A car-crash multi-man, this one had some great spots, including Sami Zayn hitting his plancha through the legs of the ladder and finishing it off with a through-the-ropes tornado DDT on longtime rival Owens. I liked the "Superkicks Galore" sequence out of Dolph Ziggler, one of many homages to the stars of yesteryear on this show. I'm one of those people that doesn't mind the "HBK Tribute Act" moments out of Ziggler, but think they made a misstep when they didn't just make the superkick his finish years ago - by taking that one move from Michaels' playbook (and making no bones about using it as a finish), I feel like it would've freed up Ziggler to focus on differentiating the rest of his act to stand apart. I mean, Ric Flair stole his nickname and finish from Buddy Rogers and it worked pretty well for him. ANYWAY...loved the Polka Dot Ladder and Sin Cara's springboard somersault earlier in the match too. Overall, a really fun opener with a very surprising twist ending that turned a deaf ear to what the crowd actually wanted. Zack Ryder's peak of popularity was at least 4 or 5 years ago, so I'm not sure where this booking came from aside from wanting to shock the audience by giving the least likely candidate the victory. (4/5)
Chris Jericho took on AJ Styles next. I enjoyed the nifty, non-stop counter sequences early on and Y2J even busting out a new move (a ropes-assisted reverse neckbreaker). I liked Jericho slowing the pacing down to offer something different than the fast-paced ladder match, but several of the sequences seemed like they took more work to set-up than the pay-off they produced (for example, the front suplex spot from the top rope). The third act saw a ton of finisher reversals, counters, and kickouts, which elevated things nicely, but again, suffered from some sloppy moments, especially out of Jericho, who seemed to not hit his Codebreakers with both knees and blatantly positioned himself multiple times for AJ's 450 splash. Like the opener, the finish was another surprise and, again, not the most pleasant one. I liked this match more than one on RAW and FastLane, but I can understand the booking really angering others. In the span of 3 months, AJ has gone from being a very big "get" for the WWE to just another mid-card talent. Wasn't the depleted roster a sign that they needed to build stars and not just cruise with the aging ones they have now? (3.5/5)
I expected some breaks in the action, but the show continued rapidly with The New Day taking on The League of Nations. Speaking of guys who, months ago, seemed like major signings but now are obviously a tier below important, Alberto Del Rio was in this match. New Day's entrance was pretty cool, but far from "OMG!" level, which was a bit disappointing considering that the New Day's elaborate introduction and costumes were a fairly big talking point in the build-up to the show. When the bell rang, Xavier Woods played a pretty good face-in-peril and I liked the fire in Big E trying to make saves and Kofi Kingston eventually getting the hot tag. Rusev was the MVP for his team while King Barrett was a complete non-factor, either due to injury or due to him reportedly requesting his release recently. I liked the finish for keeping Sheamus' finish strong, but again, it noticeably went against how a showcase for New Day should've gone for no particular reason aside from just upsetting the crowd. (2.5/5)
After cutting a promo on how no three superstars could ever beat them, the League of Nations were attacked by Shawn Michaels, Mick Foley, and "Stone Cold" Steve Austin. I liked the segment, especially Austin giving a stunner to Xavier Woods when he tried to make the Texas Rattlesnake dance with him. I would've liked things even more if Austin had done the same to Foley and HBK and I'm not sure the fans in attendance wouldn't have popped even louder for that. I understand and agree that the segment hurt New Day more than it helped, but as far as "moments" go, it didn't detract from the show too much for me. It also wasn't good enough to warrant a "+1" on my scoresheet.
One of the (if not the) most highly anticipated match-ups of the night was next - Brock Lesnar taking on Dean Ambrose in a Streetfight (because "Texas Deathmatch" was too barbaric a term?). We found ourselves in "Suplex City" early, but Ambrose wouldn't stay down, at one point giving Lesnar a big "thumbs up" and slapping the Beast in the face. Suplex #9 led to some particularly good selling out of Ambrose, who really did a masterful job of taking big bumps and making the crowd feel them too. Where this match lost me was exactly where most fans anticipated it would fall apart - the minute Ambrose started busting out weapons so "anti-PG" that there was simply no way they'd ever be used, specifically the chainsaw and the barb-wired 2x4. While Ambrose's work with chairs was nice (though, dissimilar to what he had done in a previous hardcore match with Seth Rollins), considering that this match was advertised to be one of the craziest brawls we'd ever see, it came off as relatively tame, especially considering the blood we got on the NXT show Friday night. I would've liked to see this match go longer and, though I know it would've been a risky move for Ambrose, maybe a game-time decision to say "'F' It!" and get a little bit of color, something that Lesnar has been up for in the past. Without that crucial element, the streetfight came off as underwhelming and considerably tamer than it needed to be. Even a "bad" Lesnar match is going to be better than average and this one certainly was, but anyone expecting a potential Match of the Year candidate (hell, even a Match of the Night candidate) would have been fairly disappointed in this one. Designed to be a star-making turn for Ambrose, this was anything but that. (3/5)
Fortunately, the next bout was the Match of the Night - Charlotte defending her Divas (now Womens') Championship against Sasha Banks and Becky Lynch. All three women got strong crowd responses, but Sasha was the clear favorite (even before she arrived with WWE Hall of Famer Snoop Doggy Dogg rapping her entrance theme). The start of this match was fast-paced but made perfect sense, each performer getting a chance to shine and hit at least 1-2 signature spots. Aside from just playing "the hits," though, there was a respectable amount of innovation on display: Lynch connecting on a pump-handle chokeslam, Charlotte hitting an awesome backbreaker to Lynch on the corner at one point, and, later, locking in her Figure 8 submission only to have it broken up by a Sasha frog splash (a nod to her idol Eddie Guerrero, whose colors she wore). Sasha would hit but an incredible front-flip suicide dive when the action spilled outside, but not to be outdone, Lynch came crashing down on Charlotte's old man while the Champion hit an awesome moonsault on both of her opponents from the top rope to the outside. The final third of the match was just as good as the prevous two acts, highlighted by a strong submission exchange sequence as well as a Becky Lynch T-Bone suplex from the top rope. There were probably a dozen or so other great spots that I failed to jot down as it was just impossible to keep up with the action. Some fans will complain about the finish, but I saw nothing wrong with it - in fact, as long as we continue to get these three women battling it out, I don't really care who is holding the title for right now. As fun as the IC Ladder Match was, this one was considerably better, more memorable, and much more recommended. (4/5)
At this point, I imagined that we'd be getting The Rock or some other segment, but instead we went right to, arguably, the most hyped and important match on the card - The Undertaker vs. Shane McMahon in a Hell in a Cell Match with Shane fighting to wrest control of Monday Night RAW from his father, Vince McMahon (though, the commentators wouldn't play up this fact as Shane's motivation nearly enough for me). Shane arrived on the scene with his children, while the Undertaker got his usual (lengthy) entrance. Early on, Shane got destroyed, but the crowd seemed bored, possibly anticipating run-ins that would never come. Minutes later we got our first sign of just how much this match was going to insult the fans' "fanhood," Shane kicking out of the Last Ride because...As the match wore on, Shane managed to latch on a triangle choke (and sharpshooter) that Undertaker sold and, seemingly, couldn't reverse or fight out of despite a history of being able to counter these exact maneuvers out of guys like Brock Lesnar and Kurt Angle. Undertaker hit a chokeslam on the steel steps and, again, Shane kicked out because...Shane came back with a DDT onto the steps, but Undertaker kept the upperhand by pulling him into his own dreaded submission finisher, the Hell's Gate. Shane, miraculously, held on for minutes on end, surviving the move far longer than Brock Lesnar did at SummerSlam and eventually reversing it into the aforementioned Sharpshooter. Shane hit a coast-to-coast for the first legitimately cool moment of the match and the crowd came alive. Shane started looking up into the heavens and used some bolt cutters to loosen one of the cage walls, getting tackled through it moments later by a pissed off Deadman. The spot earned a largely unwarranted "This is Awesome" chant and led to some brawling on the outside, including a spot in which Taker, with Shane on his back, sacrificed his own body by jumping from the barricade through a table. With both men out, Shane managed to get up and mount some unexpected offense, crushing Taker with a monitor just like he did on RAW last week. With Undertaker sprawled on the table, Shane O-Mac climbed to the top of the cage and attempted one of the craziest, riskiest bumps in wrestling history - an elbow drop from the top of the cage through a table on the outside. Undertaker moved, though, and, minutes later, got taken out with a Tombstone to end what can only be described as an "elaborate stunt" of a match. Unlike Foley/Taker, the most legendary Hell in a Cell match ever and one that featured a similar spot, this match will offer nothing in repeat viewings. Considering the build-up of this bout was all about "legacies," the legacy of the Undertaker got shat on pretty heavy here as he had to sell for the untrained boss's son and then, in the match's peak moment, sit back and watch as Shane McMahon played out his own personal fantasy of "sports-entertainment" (to call it "wrestling" would be an insult to every actual wrestler ever). I'm tempted to reward this match at least a half-point for the bump, but I was so offended by everything else that happened in this "spectacle" that I won't. Someone wrote this on a website I frequent and it bears paraphrasing here - this 30+ minute "match" can be reduced to a 3-second gif without losing anything in the reduction. Shane sticking his thumb in the air, Super Dave-style, as he was wheeled off only added to the feeling that this was nothing more than a vain attempt by Shane to "pop" his own kids and maybe his friends, rather than actually attempt to put together something resembling a believable match. I expected this match to feature stunts, but I definitely didn't expect the build-up to those stunts to be so offensive. (0/5)
The Andre The Giant Battle Royale was next and was actually one of the more enjoyable (though, far from "must see") bouts of the evening, in no small part due to guest appearances by the one and only Shaquille O'Neal, Diamond Dallas Page, and Tatanka. I wasn't a huge fan of the finish here as I just don't see why Baron Corbin needed to get the W when the crowd would've been happier seeing "home state hero" Mark Henry capture the prize, Goldust take it home for his old man, or been just as excited to see an actual *babyface* from NXT win rather than the brand's top heel. I'm not going to say this was a "great" battle royale (and, aside from Shaq's appearance, would probably say that last year's edition was better), but at least it didn't offend me. (2/5)
Chris Jericho took on AJ Styles next. I enjoyed the nifty, non-stop counter sequences early on and Y2J even busting out a new move (a ropes-assisted reverse neckbreaker). I liked Jericho slowing the pacing down to offer something different than the fast-paced ladder match, but several of the sequences seemed like they took more work to set-up than the pay-off they produced (for example, the front suplex spot from the top rope). The third act saw a ton of finisher reversals, counters, and kickouts, which elevated things nicely, but again, suffered from some sloppy moments, especially out of Jericho, who seemed to not hit his Codebreakers with both knees and blatantly positioned himself multiple times for AJ's 450 splash. Like the opener, the finish was another surprise and, again, not the most pleasant one. I liked this match more than one on RAW and FastLane, but I can understand the booking really angering others. In the span of 3 months, AJ has gone from being a very big "get" for the WWE to just another mid-card talent. Wasn't the depleted roster a sign that they needed to build stars and not just cruise with the aging ones they have now? (3.5/5)
I expected some breaks in the action, but the show continued rapidly with The New Day taking on The League of Nations. Speaking of guys who, months ago, seemed like major signings but now are obviously a tier below important, Alberto Del Rio was in this match. New Day's entrance was pretty cool, but far from "OMG!" level, which was a bit disappointing considering that the New Day's elaborate introduction and costumes were a fairly big talking point in the build-up to the show. When the bell rang, Xavier Woods played a pretty good face-in-peril and I liked the fire in Big E trying to make saves and Kofi Kingston eventually getting the hot tag. Rusev was the MVP for his team while King Barrett was a complete non-factor, either due to injury or due to him reportedly requesting his release recently. I liked the finish for keeping Sheamus' finish strong, but again, it noticeably went against how a showcase for New Day should've gone for no particular reason aside from just upsetting the crowd. (2.5/5)
After cutting a promo on how no three superstars could ever beat them, the League of Nations were attacked by Shawn Michaels, Mick Foley, and "Stone Cold" Steve Austin. I liked the segment, especially Austin giving a stunner to Xavier Woods when he tried to make the Texas Rattlesnake dance with him. I would've liked things even more if Austin had done the same to Foley and HBK and I'm not sure the fans in attendance wouldn't have popped even louder for that. I understand and agree that the segment hurt New Day more than it helped, but as far as "moments" go, it didn't detract from the show too much for me. It also wasn't good enough to warrant a "+1" on my scoresheet.
One of the (if not the) most highly anticipated match-ups of the night was next - Brock Lesnar taking on Dean Ambrose in a Streetfight (because "Texas Deathmatch" was too barbaric a term?). We found ourselves in "Suplex City" early, but Ambrose wouldn't stay down, at one point giving Lesnar a big "thumbs up" and slapping the Beast in the face. Suplex #9 led to some particularly good selling out of Ambrose, who really did a masterful job of taking big bumps and making the crowd feel them too. Where this match lost me was exactly where most fans anticipated it would fall apart - the minute Ambrose started busting out weapons so "anti-PG" that there was simply no way they'd ever be used, specifically the chainsaw and the barb-wired 2x4. While Ambrose's work with chairs was nice (though, dissimilar to what he had done in a previous hardcore match with Seth Rollins), considering that this match was advertised to be one of the craziest brawls we'd ever see, it came off as relatively tame, especially considering the blood we got on the NXT show Friday night. I would've liked to see this match go longer and, though I know it would've been a risky move for Ambrose, maybe a game-time decision to say "'F' It!" and get a little bit of color, something that Lesnar has been up for in the past. Without that crucial element, the streetfight came off as underwhelming and considerably tamer than it needed to be. Even a "bad" Lesnar match is going to be better than average and this one certainly was, but anyone expecting a potential Match of the Year candidate (hell, even a Match of the Night candidate) would have been fairly disappointed in this one. Designed to be a star-making turn for Ambrose, this was anything but that. (3/5)
Fortunately, the next bout was the Match of the Night - Charlotte defending her Divas (now Womens') Championship against Sasha Banks and Becky Lynch. All three women got strong crowd responses, but Sasha was the clear favorite (even before she arrived with WWE Hall of Famer Snoop Doggy Dogg rapping her entrance theme). The start of this match was fast-paced but made perfect sense, each performer getting a chance to shine and hit at least 1-2 signature spots. Aside from just playing "the hits," though, there was a respectable amount of innovation on display: Lynch connecting on a pump-handle chokeslam, Charlotte hitting an awesome backbreaker to Lynch on the corner at one point, and, later, locking in her Figure 8 submission only to have it broken up by a Sasha frog splash (a nod to her idol Eddie Guerrero, whose colors she wore). Sasha would hit but an incredible front-flip suicide dive when the action spilled outside, but not to be outdone, Lynch came crashing down on Charlotte's old man while the Champion hit an awesome moonsault on both of her opponents from the top rope to the outside. The final third of the match was just as good as the prevous two acts, highlighted by a strong submission exchange sequence as well as a Becky Lynch T-Bone suplex from the top rope. There were probably a dozen or so other great spots that I failed to jot down as it was just impossible to keep up with the action. Some fans will complain about the finish, but I saw nothing wrong with it - in fact, as long as we continue to get these three women battling it out, I don't really care who is holding the title for right now. As fun as the IC Ladder Match was, this one was considerably better, more memorable, and much more recommended. (4/5)
At this point, I imagined that we'd be getting The Rock or some other segment, but instead we went right to, arguably, the most hyped and important match on the card - The Undertaker vs. Shane McMahon in a Hell in a Cell Match with Shane fighting to wrest control of Monday Night RAW from his father, Vince McMahon (though, the commentators wouldn't play up this fact as Shane's motivation nearly enough for me). Shane arrived on the scene with his children, while the Undertaker got his usual (lengthy) entrance. Early on, Shane got destroyed, but the crowd seemed bored, possibly anticipating run-ins that would never come. Minutes later we got our first sign of just how much this match was going to insult the fans' "fanhood," Shane kicking out of the Last Ride because...As the match wore on, Shane managed to latch on a triangle choke (and sharpshooter) that Undertaker sold and, seemingly, couldn't reverse or fight out of despite a history of being able to counter these exact maneuvers out of guys like Brock Lesnar and Kurt Angle. Undertaker hit a chokeslam on the steel steps and, again, Shane kicked out because...Shane came back with a DDT onto the steps, but Undertaker kept the upperhand by pulling him into his own dreaded submission finisher, the Hell's Gate. Shane, miraculously, held on for minutes on end, surviving the move far longer than Brock Lesnar did at SummerSlam and eventually reversing it into the aforementioned Sharpshooter. Shane hit a coast-to-coast for the first legitimately cool moment of the match and the crowd came alive. Shane started looking up into the heavens and used some bolt cutters to loosen one of the cage walls, getting tackled through it moments later by a pissed off Deadman. The spot earned a largely unwarranted "This is Awesome" chant and led to some brawling on the outside, including a spot in which Taker, with Shane on his back, sacrificed his own body by jumping from the barricade through a table. With both men out, Shane managed to get up and mount some unexpected offense, crushing Taker with a monitor just like he did on RAW last week. With Undertaker sprawled on the table, Shane O-Mac climbed to the top of the cage and attempted one of the craziest, riskiest bumps in wrestling history - an elbow drop from the top of the cage through a table on the outside. Undertaker moved, though, and, minutes later, got taken out with a Tombstone to end what can only be described as an "elaborate stunt" of a match. Unlike Foley/Taker, the most legendary Hell in a Cell match ever and one that featured a similar spot, this match will offer nothing in repeat viewings. Considering the build-up of this bout was all about "legacies," the legacy of the Undertaker got shat on pretty heavy here as he had to sell for the untrained boss's son and then, in the match's peak moment, sit back and watch as Shane McMahon played out his own personal fantasy of "sports-entertainment" (to call it "wrestling" would be an insult to every actual wrestler ever). I'm tempted to reward this match at least a half-point for the bump, but I was so offended by everything else that happened in this "spectacle" that I won't. Someone wrote this on a website I frequent and it bears paraphrasing here - this 30+ minute "match" can be reduced to a 3-second gif without losing anything in the reduction. Shane sticking his thumb in the air, Super Dave-style, as he was wheeled off only added to the feeling that this was nothing more than a vain attempt by Shane to "pop" his own kids and maybe his friends, rather than actually attempt to put together something resembling a believable match. I expected this match to feature stunts, but I definitely didn't expect the build-up to those stunts to be so offensive. (0/5)
The Andre The Giant Battle Royale was next and was actually one of the more enjoyable (though, far from "must see") bouts of the evening, in no small part due to guest appearances by the one and only Shaquille O'Neal, Diamond Dallas Page, and Tatanka. I wasn't a huge fan of the finish here as I just don't see why Baron Corbin needed to get the W when the crowd would've been happier seeing "home state hero" Mark Henry capture the prize, Goldust take it home for his old man, or been just as excited to see an actual *babyface* from NXT win rather than the brand's top heel. I'm not going to say this was a "great" battle royale (and, aside from Shaq's appearance, would probably say that last year's edition was better), but at least it didn't offend me. (2/5)
The Rock arrived, with a flamethrower, to cut a meandering promo about "little Rockies and Rockettes" and hype the WWE's new attendance record. The Wyatts showed up in a move that would've felt special...if the Wyatts weren't complete jokes at this point, no more frightening or relevant than the Social Outcasts. I was surprised by the impromptu Rock vs. Rowan match, but mostly because of the way the Rock ripped off his pants to reveal that he was suited up to compete all along. Are we to believe he wears his trunks under his clothes every time he shows up in the WWE? Outside the WWE? After destroying Rowan in six seconds, the Wyatts surrounded the ring, but there was never any fear that they'd be able to take Rock out because, honestly, who's the last person they dominated? John Cena returned to help out his old rival and the segment stretched the show well past the 11 PM cut-off that many fans expected. Like the Austin segment, I didn't hate this and was admittedly entertained by some of it - but there were no "goosebumps," no feeling that I had just witnessed a real "moment" as much as a pre-fabricated Vince-approved one, no drive to text a buddy and say "Did you see that?!?" Compare that to Nakamura's debut on Friday and one can understand why I wanted more out of a Rock experience hyped since January.
Main event time - Triple H vs. Roman Reigns for Trips' WWE World Championship. Stephanie McMahon opened up what was a fairly standard-to-good Triple H main event with a batshit insane promo dressed as Tina Turner from Beyond The Thunderdome. Reigns' entrance was equally elaborate, him punching the ground and setting off thousands of dollars worth of pyro. When the bell rang, Triple H took control and didn't really let up, working the match at a good pace and spacing out the bigger spots for maximum impact. The crowd booed Reigns' hope spots throughout and seemed generally disinterested in anything that happened for the first 10-15 minutes, obviously just anticipating a run-in or swerve rather than really caring about the story of the match. There were a handful of cool spots and moments, though two of them (Triple H tossing Reigns over the Spanish Announce Table and Reigns powering out of Triple H's triangle choke with a sit-out powerbomb) were repeated for no particular reason aside from seemingly just to stretch time by an extra minute or two and make the match seem more "epic." Like Triple H's main event matches with Randy Orton, John Cena, and Chris Jericho at previous WrestleManias, this match wasn't out-and-out terrible - but it certainly wasn't the Match of the Night or close to it. Stephanie getting hit with a huge spear was the best moment of the match, but seemed almost wasted considering how small of a role she has played in the build-up towards the match (especially compared to feuds where she may have actually been too involved - like the aforementioned ones with Jericho and Orton). I've read some reviews that want to call this match "underrated" based on the idea that fans are more upset with the booking of the last 3 seconds than what actually happened for the 20-minutes before it, but I don't buy that. This was a true, somewhat stereotypical Triple H title match - generally solid and designed well with even a few outstanding stand-alone moments, but nothing I'd ever go out of my way to rewatch in its entirety. (3.5/5)
With an overall average score of 2.81-out-of-5, WrestleMania 32 wasn't a total waste of time, but it mostly was. The Intercontinental Title Ladder Match and Womens' Championship bout were the only ones truly worth checking out, while, if you have a spare 10 seconds on your hand, you can catch the best and only worthwhile moment of the Shane/Taker contest on YouTube or elsewhere. The main event was good, certainly better than average, but didn't feel any more special than Triple H's match with Ambrose from Toronto last month. Lesnar/Ambrose was a disappointment, as was AJ/Jericho, both pairings seeming to somehow show less chemistry now than they did when their rivalries began. I enjoyed the special appearances by Shaquille O'Neal, Snoop Doggy Dogg, and DDP more than what Austin, Shawn Michaels, The Rock, and John Cena did on the show and I don't think I'm alone. Prepare to see this year's edition of the Super Bowl of Wrestling end up on many people's future lists of worst Manias ever. Superfans will find moments to enjoy, as I did, but as a whole, there were lots of holes in this show.
FINAL RATING - Watch It...With Remote In Hand
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