After a video highlighting the Austin/Rikishi angle - which was met with general indifference or outright disdain by the WWE audience at the time - No Mercy 2000 kicks off with the Dudley Boys Tag Team Table Invitational match. The first two teams out are Too Cool and the short-lived duo of Chaz and D'Lo Brown, aka Lo-Down. Chaz was former Headbanger Mosh and maybe had his most infamous gimmick as Beaver Cleavidge, a tasteless incest-based wrestler that had zero chance of getting over and unsurprisingly didn't. D'Lo has admitted over the years that while he liked teaming with Chaz, his motivation and confidence had suffered after an accidental and tragic incident in which he improperly executed a powerbomb and paralyzed Darren "Droz" Drozdov during a SmackDown taping in 99'. Neither of these two teams were particularly over or interesting as Too Cool's gimmicky "Pretty Fly For 2 White Guys" routine had run its course and then some. Too Cool continue on and square off against Raven and Tazz, two guys not known for their tag team work (and rightfully so). This is just a sloppy mess and a botched table spot on the outside involving Sexay splintering a table by merely putting on his foot on it draw groans and laughs from the audience. Raven and Tazz eliminated Too Cool but didn't last too long against The Dudleys - who one would assume would've been the last entrants but for some reason weren't. The Right To Censor's Bull Buchanan and The Goodfather almost got a sneaky win, but the referee reversed the decision. "Dusty finishes," as their known in the biz, absolutely have their place...but not in meaningless opening matches with no stakes. Its not like Buchanan and Goodfather were a credible team that needed to be protected (though I was shocked to learn that, at some point, they did actually capture the WWE Tag Team Titles). Anyway, this was not good, but at least it moved swiftly. (2/5)
The next "match" was really more of a segment as the scheduled Test & Albert w/ Trish Stratus vs. The APA and Lita mixed tag match never actually happened. Instead, Test and Albert beat down the APA backstage and then cornered Lita in the ring, who was rescued by the Hardys. I'm not going to give this a +1, but I'm tempted to because it was really nice not having to sit through what I assume would've been a not very good match involving two teams that were really only watchable when they were working with smaller opponents they could toss around.
Next up - a cage match to (hopefully) finish the feud between Chris Jericho and X-Pac. If I'm not mistaken, this is around the time when Jericho was still trying to prove his worth to Vince McMahon and was thus paired with X-Pac (who Vince saw as being his most reliable in-ring performer). This is better than their somewhat sloppy match from Unforgiven the month before, but its certainly not a spotlight match for Jericho as much as further proof of how underrated X-Pac could be (and also how miscast he was as a heel oftentimes). X-Pac takes some absolutely awesome bumps into the cage in this match that I really wish more wrestlers would take today, just throwing himself into the steel walls. At one point X-Pac also takes a powerbomb off the top rope that, again, just makes me think how tough Waltman was rather than how good Jericho is.At one point, X-Pac also gets the visual pin clean in the middle of the ring - but this match is "escape only" so it doesn't count. I understand wanting to "protect" or save a guy's heat, but the finish being "escape only" already accomplishes that and X-Pac scoring the pin, in the middle of the ring, 100% clean, doesn't do Jericho any favors. The finish is tremendous, though, as Jericho takes a huge back bump off the top of the cage after applying the Walls of Jericho. X-Pac looks to have things sewn up, but hot dogs it a little bit as he climbs down and ends up crotched on the cell door! Again, the coolest parts of this match are all X-Pac's eventhough Jericho is the one who gets the W. (3/5)
The Right To Censor are back out for the next match - but this time its Val Venis and Steven Richards taking on Chyna and "Mr. Ass" Billy Gunn (who now was fully into his "Ass Man" gimmick, ridiculous theme song and all). This was originally supposed to be either Gunn vs. Guerrero or Guerrero vs. Chyna or who knows what (or cares), but Guerrero was injured on RAW (not sure if that was a shoot or kayfabe) so that match was cancelled in favor of this. Poor fans. Chyna and Gunn were over (the former more than the latter), Venis and Richards could draw heat, but that doesn't mean the results are remotely worthy of being on PPV or your time 20+ years later. In the end, there's a bunch of nonsense that leads to Eddie Guerrero showing up and hitting Chyna in the back with a bouquet of flowers that knock her out cold...because, we find out later, there was a metal pipe in it. What was the point of hiding the pipe if the attack was behind the ref's back anyway? Was it just the symbolism that ol' Eddie wanted there? Who knows and who cares. This was not good. (1/5)
Rikishi made his way down the aisle and gloated about his opponent, Steve Austin, not even being in the building out of fear. Rikishi demands that Mick Foley come out to raise his hand and Foley does show up...but immediately the glass breaks and out drives Austin. What was the point of that? Just to give Foley a pop in front of the live crowd? Whatever. Austin absolutely destroys Rikishi, who gets in the occasional bit of offense but mostly just bumps around and takes weapon shots. This was never going to be a great wrestling match, but I do wonder if maybe they could've picked someone that was better at the pinball style and over-the-top bumping that would've made this better. Looking at the roster, there was slim pickings, but I daresay somebody like Regal or Stevie Richards could've worked...though, from a storyline perspective, they both wouldn't have fit the bill. Alas, this is fine for what it is and ends when Austin puts a bloodied Rikishi onto the flatbed of his truck and drives him out to the parking lot. Austin looks to run him over, but before he can, a police car swerves into his path and we get a collision. Austin gets arrested for attempted murder? Drunk driving (he does swig a beer before pulling out of the arena)? The segment is entertaining and the crowd loves it, for sure, but the placement on the card kinda tells you all you need to know about how over this storyline was and Austin's positioning upon his return compared to where he was before he left. (2.5/5)
Back in the ring, William Regal defends his European Championship against Mideon. Who on Earth thought a Mideon match on a PPV was a good idea? Regal works hard, but even an all-time great worker like him can't carry Mideon to something passable here, especially as the former Ministry member was now working an awful nudist gimmick. This isn't unbearable because it only lasts 6 minutes and Regal does do just enough to earn this a half star, but, man, this was sub-Raw level stuff. (0.5/5)
Edge and Christian couldn't challenge for The Hardy's WWE Tag Team Championships for some reason or another, so they had opted to disguise themselves as Los Conquistadores. Their cage match at the previous month's show was unique in its layout, if not a truly great match, while this is just your standard tag team match with Jeff Hardy playing the face in peril and Edge and Christian not doing anything at all to mask their true identities. I kinda wish they had done something fun and had two other guys under the mask leading to some switcheroos and actual intrigue, but, nope, there's none of that sort of thing here - just a straight-up tag team match really with maybe 10-20% more comedy. Edge and Christian end up stealing the victory and regaining the championships. (2/5)
Next up - Triple H vs. Chris Benoit. This match is worked weird to me. Its clear that Triple H wants to prove that is just as great a technical wrestler as Benoit, but does he have to dominate so much of this match to prove that point? Its fun to see Triple H busting out a greater variety of holds than he typically would, but it becomes a bit of a bore watching Chris Benoit - who came into this match as the heel - getting swallowed up for minutes on end. When Benoit does get some offense in, Triple H cuts him off repeatedly and the Wolverine comes across as the one "fighting from underneath." I like the targeted offense out of both men, but Stephanie McMahon's interference toward the end felt unnecessary and "tacked on," especially as, earlier in the show, Triple H had made it a point to tell Stephanie not to accompany him to the ring. I guess my biggest gripe is that, with Benoit's gimmick being that he was such a sound technical wrestler, he should've had more time to showcase that skill in the first half of the match. This was good, but not great. (3.5/5)
Main event time - The Rock defending the WWE Championship against Kurt Angle. If the previous match offered a variation of the classic formula by having the babyface control so much of the match compared to the heel, this was more of your typical Attitude Era main event. The Rock dominates to start, but the match is much more of a wild brawl and Angle is able to keep things relatively even at times thanks to interference from Stephanie (she eats a Rock Bottom at one point to a huge ovation). Unlike The Rock/Benoit match from a few shows before this, this one doesn't bother much with technical wrestling and relies mostly on The Rock's charisma and Angle's ability to take a punishment to keep the crowd engaged, plus additional run-ins by Triple H and Rikishi (who comes out looking like a zombie in a diaper). Because this was the WWE in 2000, none of this interference - or a blatant low blow later - causes a DQ or anything and is all just part of the mayhem, the crowd eating it up all of it. The Rock eventually hits a Rock Bottom, but can't make the cover soon enough and Angle kicks out. This leads to Rikishi coming in and attempting a splash in the corner only for him to hit The Rock instead! He then goes for a superkick and, again, its The Rock who gets taken out! Angle hits the Olympic Slam on Rikishi and then nails one on The Rock to win the big one! I forgot how well-executed that finish was, especially as so much of the heat ended up on Rikishi, with Angle's victory almost getting a face pop until fans realized that The Rock lost. This was good, but not an all-time classic or anything. (3/5)
With a Kwang Score of 2.19-out-of-5, No Mercy 2000 is a tough show to recommend - especially if you're justifiably put-off by watching Chris Benoit, whose match against Triple H is the best of the night. The main event and the X-Pac/Jericho matches are fine, but there are a number of outright bad matches filling up the rest of the card, from the unfunny joke of Mideon/Regal to the unentertaining mediocrity of the Right to Censor/Chyna & Billy Gunn match. Even for a random episode of RAW or SmackDown from this era, these would be poor segments. The biggest problem on this show is really the average-at-best Austin/Rikishi bout, a grudge match in theory that doesn't feel, at any point, like the big moment and cataclysmic return that it needed to be. Even its placement on the card seems to hint to how underwhelming the Austin saga had become by this point.
FINAL RATING - High Risk Maneuver
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